I am
  Not the one
          Who will deal with
                    All your lies and all
                           Your hatred. I am the one
                                     Who will perhaps send you to salvation.

*With my knife-sharpened words

In my dreams
I wait for happiness to approach
For someone to save me from this dismal corner of my mind
Where the sun is cold and the years scorch my face
The scarce amount of peace in my bones
Leaks through my skin
Leaving me as nothing
No matter how far I stumble
I can't seem to fall away
From his clammy grasp
A war that I will never win
The trees grow taller as much as my timid personality
Towers over my dead-and-gone self confidence
Someone please save me from this inundating despair
Even in my nomadic mind
I still revolve around a deep melancholy
Not even all the therapists in the world could catch me
My dream is a reflection
      Of the storm in my eyes

I wish I didn't feel
I wish I didn't think
My intelligence is a curse
My heart begins to sink

I wish I couldn't love
I wish my heart was cold
My words are locked up
A story that's untold

I wish I didnt care
I wish I didn't scream
My nights are filled with terror
A misery filling my dreams

I still love
I Still feel
I still think but I wish it was real

I still care
I still scream
My heart is still warm
I so badly want to be unseen
My tears only wash away
So much to hide the pain

I keep it in so you don't see
The storm that's inside of me

I could say that you and I
Were love gone wrong.
But we started as the truth,
And ended as a lie.

No reason for me to be jealous
Of the love that I could see in the ghost of her
That was in your eyes.

It was too familiar to be my reflection.

I can't express all the hurt that I felt
Even when I said goodbye.
You couldn't begin to try
To imagine what you started.

I was the one who started and ended the love affair
With a love that even I knew wasn't there.

But the truth of the matter is-
You had me all along
But I never had you at all.

i miss the way you planted butterflies in my stomach and fireflies in the pupils of my eyes.

I have this dream of a,
blood orange sky rippling
Down through the cracked window pane,
Of this crumbling house.
The faint sigh of faded beauty
Resonates among these chipped walls.
We walk there down
the boulevard from when we were happy.
Yet all I can feel is the fleeting feeling, I felt when
your lipstick stained
my cheek for the
final time.

I am ashamed of what I did for
                                            Your attention
                    My skin did not deserve
                              All those

B
     l
         o
              o
                   d
                         y
                                               



  *scars