a little more time ,
that's all we needed.

a little warm hug,
to feel safe at home.

Years ago
We stayed up till
3 am talking,
And today
I don’t even know
How to say hi,

your name is
forbidden in
my mouth
or in my heart
because when
i think about
you;

i'll cry a little more,
hurt a little stronger
love a little softer
because you no longer
make me feel sober

i'm drunk on the
memory of you

I feel like there’s too much on
        my mind to write any of it down

everything seems to be speaking
everything wishes to be louder
     all I can do is stare at my toes

my mind and body have been screaming
                         for months
    at me
            in general

it’s too much to write down
    too much to let it out

                                 I might explode
                           or just deflate


I feel like I’ve been treading water
          for longer than I can

and my mouth and nose are finally, slowly
filling with water
            trickling down my throat
                           filling my belly
                as I sink
                       beneath the waves

Grief doesn't have an expiry date.
So if it hits you in the guts
everytime you hear her name,
grieve and feel every emotion
it evokes in you.
You have every right to
not disregard it.