he looked at you like you were
the ocean and he was
desperate to
drown.

When people look at me
I wonder what they say
But maybe I am better off
Not knowing, in this way

They tell us go to school
Better yourself this way
But how am I gaining
When I lose myself each day

Walking through the halls
Whispers can be heard
School can be torture
If you are deemed a nerd

Bullying free zone
That's what the teachers say
They don't see it as it happens
But we see it every day

What if I could just end it
One girl asks on the brink
As she picks up her razor
And sits down on the sink

A second and I'll be done
Never to hear again
The question isn't "Will it happen?"
It should just be "When?"

So if you see a person
Sitting there alone
Sit down right beside them
Show them that they're known

there is a vast peace
in the respite
of disease;
aware both of
infinite time
and finite life,
giving notice to
what endures,
what passes.
each moment hangs
glowing in
the sunset of eternity,
perfect,
ripe and juicy
as the strawberry
growing
from the cliff.
tiger of living above,
chasm of death below,
hanging by a
breaking branch
with red-stained lips.

Come morning I awoke with you.
On my mind.
Alone.

Faded fingerprints upon my heart.
Your touch remains.
Unknown.

A reminder of everything I ever was.
Or could have.
Been.

I did just enough to make you fall in love.
With someone else.
Again.

Cars collide and I wake up,
Dressed in someone else’s skin,
I don’t know which way I was going,
I couldn’t tell you where I’d been.

We talked that night in broken pieces,
Or was it all inside my head?
You asked me if I was sorry,
And I asked if I was dead.

I walked along the empty hallways,
Lost in poison, fog and mist,
Desperate to find some meaning,
In memories that don’t exist.

You said I’d been trying so hard lately,
But sometimes this is how things go,
My mom told me to keep my guard up,
My dad called to say he told me so.

Now all alone in some apartment,
And still surrounded all the same,
Trying to find my sense of balance,
Or lose everything that I became.

The day fell cold and lonely,
A broken glass, a hotel floor,
These scars still serve as a reminder,
Life can always hurt much more.

Lie to me, please lie to me,
Just make me feel ok,
Nothing will matter in the morning,
I was never meant to stay.

We turn and burn and never learn,
New days, the same old times,
Wherever you pray, let’s go there now,
Forgive us for our crimes.

Thick choking smoke sings me awake,
She says, “Leave me behind.”
I lift my head to ask her what she said,
“Oh nothing, never mind.”

It was all a matchstick fairytale,
Some coldblooded grasp at fate,
A redemption burned in effigy,
A salvation far too late.

I saw her in statues,
a summit so high,
but all mountains crumble,
in pursuit of the sky.

She knew me as rumor,
ramshackle repose,
buried under the burden,
of dust and shadows.

I loved her in glances,  
from airplanes and cars,
on cold city nights,
spent searching for stars.

She found me unraveled,
in the ashes of art,
a child devoid of wonder,
a page torn apart.

I lost her some midnight,
in thin neon glow,
to a remaining reminder,
from late long ago.

She forgets me in pieces,
Past tense pinot noir,
a third second chance,
a well-faded scar.

I miss her as conflict,
weak in the cause,
an unfinished ending,
born of finality’s flaws.

it sounds like an old joke

i've lost over a thousand pouds
over the years

what, you say?

how can that be?

when a soul is born
to learn the biggest lesson
well, sometimes,
you have to go through some stuff

sometimes, you have to starve
to appreciate the end of famine

and so i am learning
to say goodbye
to those who can't
or won't
love me

maybe i will still be
a blessing to those folks
somehow

but right now
i've got to roll up my sleeves
and learn that biggest lesson.