Have you ever been so heartbroken
That you literally feel the pain in your chest?
That your heart actually aches?
That you feel like throwing up all the time?
That being alive just seems wrong?
Welp.
That's where I am right now..

If I could do it all over again
I'd choose *you

I always thought that we'd be stronger than this.
That we'd be able to make it through anything.

We always said we could handle these storms.
That we'd love each other through anything.

And suddenly, when the storm begins,
You're ready to leave, and let us end.

Just like that, with absolutely no warning,
You told me "I just don't wanna be in a relationship right now."

Do you even know how broken I became
When you said that that day?

After a year and six months
It's no longer me that you want?
But I loved you so much it hurts..
Never mistreated you once.
I poured my heart out to you
Let down my guard, swear to God..
I'll blow my brains in your lap.
Lay here and die in your arms..
Drop to my knees and I'm pleading
I'm trying to stop you from leaving..
You won't even listen, so **** it.

You said you wanted to be friends
You asked me not to block you out

"I still want you. I still love you.
We'll get back together soon."

Well, sir, I'm not your safety net.
If you leave, I won't be here when you finally want me.

Even if we make it through this
I'll never feel the same

I used to be so comfortable
Now all that was in vain

Because now I know
I can't let my imperfections show

If I'm not perfectly perfect
You'll think I'm not worth  it

It's tearing me apart
I gave you all of my heart

I've never given so much
Just to be left in the dust

I love everything about you
So much that I'd rather hate you

I could never be your friend
That's why I don't want this to end

For all the lovely older ladies here*

Ladies are like fine wines
They just get better with age

I cut myself about a week ago
And was genuinely surprised
To see it scar. Makes me want
To take a line off of the flesh.
Or two. Or three. Or four.
How far until I never come back?

I never have the effort
To finish anything but
Boys who take advantage
Of the stupors I put myself in.

There once was a beautiful girl
Who had a habit of looking straight ahead
Whenever she was out on a walk
And she'd happen to miss whatever
Was at her feet
And there was also another girl
Who was considered ugly and plump
Who always looked down at her feet
Whenever she was walking
Due to depression
One day she saw something
At her feet that lifted her spirits:
A one million dollar bill
And so she went home happy

*~Marian~