We kissed, we touched.
We held each others hands, we laughed.
We told stories about our past, shared the same dreams of our future.
We continued to fight for something, even if nothing was there.

Then there came that time of the day, that I need to say farewell.
I’ll never bid goodbye ‘coz it is like slipping away.
But what aches my heart is that I forgot-
The limit that I have, the words I hadn't said enough.

“I love you…” I said.
And you walked away- while I absorbed what I’ve said.
Just those precious words that I pray I could tell you everyday.

I wish I was happy to tell you how I felt-
But what made it worse is that I felt sorry, for I know it’s wrong and you won’t like it that way.

We could have been better- if you chose me than her.
We could have been stronger- if you chose to hold on.
We could have been happier- if you loved me forever.

But,

You had the best.

"Do you ever wonder where these voices came from?"

I closed my eyes and for a moment, I thought I was talking to someone else…

“Yes, I am them. They were the identities formed within my insecurities. A life I wished that I was once in; the shoes of someone I wanted to be… And to that, I have made you exist, but not living…"

"Hi?"
"How are you?"*


... are the only words left between us.
... and maybe, these words were enough.

You talk to me like I’m a complete stranger.
You reply like you don’t have any interest in talking to me.
You think I’m crazy everytime I hug you.
You want to avoid seeing you.

Suddenly,

You would ask if I already had my meal.
You would flood me with funny messages.
You would say you miss me.
You would tell that you love me.


How would you want me to feel? To feel that I am special? That I have some place in your list?

No-

Everything you ever wanted was to keep me when everything you have is lost, and to throw me away when everything you ever wanted is in your hands.