Trapped in a diverse world
Nothing others can imagine
Abandoned is how it feels
Mentally different just keeping it real  
Overthinking my mistakes
Hoping to change and grow
Been keeping this vile side on the low
Lost mind still looking to be found
Head always spinning around
Lucid minds cannot hide
Need your love to survive...

Up late thinkin bout you
Thinkin about us
What we had , was it trust?
Scared to admit if it was lust
Deep down... i give no *****
Truth is im broken with pain
Heart cold its insane
Havin these thoughts in my brain
Mixed emotions callin my name
Ready to give up this game
Always been betrayed
Said you loved me but never stayed
Hearts done getting played
Found you in the dark and helped u shine
Looking stupid thinking you were mine
Had to convince myself that im fine
Slowly killing me inside
All my feelings i have to hide
Depression is taking over my pride
Let everything set aside
Waiting for you to look me in the eyes
Riding solo til the day i die
Never believe the lies
Love’s gonna get you killed

Looking thru a reflection of myself
Tryna figure out who i really am
Am i that ambitious girl everyone looks up to?
Or am i just that girl everyone talks about?
Really I’m socially independent
Always wearing god on my pendant
Truthfully i stopped pretending
I faced reality
Seeing clearly inside of me
Begging for life to go accordingly
Living peacefully
Dreaming so vividly
Nights where it goes equally
A love charm aside of me
Not talking bout some pretty jewelry
More of a diamond
Shining brighter than the stars
Every time i look at him
I see a better reflection
Loving our affection
Everything we do
I think about the next thing
Compassion
Nevertheless
He makes me stop the stressing
Crazy how a human being can stimulate her senses
Our love deeply turned into a drug
Take it daily the prescription says
In key words
I need you instead
Us repeating in my head
Ever lasting our love
Never going to rest
One thing i learned
Live your life the best
Count your blessings next
All of that can go missing
Another lucid day
Reminiscing ...

Days passed cant relax
Worrying about others before myself
Whenever you need help
Im available
Only want to shine bright
Step back into the light
Now theres no connection holding us tight
Have to stay out the mix
Different lifestyles we can’t fix
Once i open up to you
There goes my trust
Guess that wasn’t enough
When life gets tough
I need you instead
Not available
No real friends
Who will ride with me til the end
Got myself to protect
Turned antisocial to disconnect

Woke up feelin down
Praying for happiness
Still haven’t seen it around
Losing friends but not surprised
Sames ones will return the day i die
I cant hide any more
Heart feeling sore
Been having bad dreams
Why cant i just believe
Wishing you were here with me
Now i am broken free
Hoping for better days
Just pray
Soon life will be ok