Who has not pondered their last hour
When Death points to our name on his scroll?
As we slowly wilt like summer's last flower,
What concerns will beleaguer the soul?

Who will be waiting to guide me
Down the hallway, just beyond that door
That allows passage to Eternity?
On gilded wings, will my spirit soar?

What questions will be permitted?
Will my heart discover what it seeks?
Will every fault and error committed
Flash before my eyes like lightning streaks?

Will death be unencumbered sleep,
Final escape from the bonds of Earth?
Or will we recall things that made us weep,
And all the joys that gave life its worth?

Will the flowers of love still bloom?
Though I've never carried the bouquet,
Might I be granted one blossom's perfume,
Or will denial once again hold sway?

Should I be granted one query,
With much angst I must inquire of Death:
This heart that expired alone and weary,
Will it find its peace with my last breath?

But should fragments of life still course
Through this clay, allowing pain to seep,
Then I must implore of the Divine Source:
End this game! grant me eternal sleep

Some of us know the anguish of loving
And never being loved in return;
Hope gets consumed in fires of remorse,
But despair and anguish will not burn

Some of us know the journey of the heart
Can be fatal when trust goes astray;
Soon love falters, then withers and dies,
But the memories do not decay

Some of us seem to get so close to love,
It's just within the grasp of our hand;
Into that stream we foolishly plunge,
But it's just a mirage in the sand

Some of us think love is pure happiness,
But it's love that teaches us to cry;
We've been told that love is immortal,
But through tear-filled eyes, we watch it die

Some of us have learned to dwell in darkness --
There's a strength we find within these walls;
With so many of us living here,
We laugh at loneliness when it calls

Some of us sulk, while others dare to hope
For that glorious dream that yet may be;
Some of us say we are done with love,
But you'll never hear those words from me!

A sumptuous feast adorns the table
Of those lucky few whom love has found,
Their hunger for love more than satisfied
By a banquet leaving them spellbound

What rejoicing spills from starving hearts
When love's elixir is first tasted;
They feast with a voracious appetite --
Then beg more, with not a drop wasted

They walk the ripe orchards of passion
As the sweet fruits fall into their hand;
The bounty is one to be coveted,
The harvest is nothing short of grand

But the lonely hearts stare longingly
Into the forbidden dining hall,
Hiding in shadows, they scour the floor
For any sustenance that might fall

But all they find is bread and water,
And as the banquet hall's vacated,
The lonely linger, still searching for scraps,
Their hunger for love goes unsated

Cautiously they rush the cellar door,
Anticipating what they may find --
Most likely, just a bit of rotting fruit,
Blemished, with worm holes scarring the rind

But should this not be deemed a blessing?
Though it may be seen as meagre fare,
Is not a morsel of discarded love
Better than the cupboard that lays bare?

Bread and water found by the lonely
Is the banquet upon which they feast;
Ravenously they feed on scraps of love,
Like the bone flung to a starving beast

So bring your alms of bread and water,
Take pity on these wretched losers;
Though often they dream of a royal feast,
Beggars of love cannot be choosers

The sun has deserted my sky,
Alas! not one beam will descend
To comfort me when chilling gales
Cause the fragile grasses to bend

And the wind seems preoccupied --
But what could it be thinking of?
I swear I heard it whispering:
"Tell me, Lady, where is your love?"

Please don't ask, but help dry my tears
Before night unfurls its cover,
Lest some rude star dares to inquire:
"O Lady, where is your lover?"

The restless moon's searching in vain
For two lovers veiled from his view;
He seeks the Lady and her love,
But tonight I walk without you

Was ours a love too beautiful,
Perhaps taunting the ire of Fate?
O, why did God exile our hearts
From Paradise and lock the gate?

Crashing thunder peals through the clouds,
The wind's moving with dauntless might;
No rainbow will follow this storm . . .
The Lady lost her love tonight

Being alone,  I stare at the sky,
Wishing its laws were mine to command;
I would dim the moon's refulgent light --
Might that help Heaven to understand?

Just as the moon's radiance would be missed
If it were abducted from its realm,
So my ship sails with no guiding light --
Too long I've stood alone at the helm

Would the dreary woodland not rejoice
Hearing the song of one faithful bird?
Yet, alone I trudge down Life's harsh path,
Deprived of Love's reassuring word

Being alone, I find no reason
To greet the dawning day with a smile;
I see no sense in praying for strength
To carry my cross another mile

Being alone, I cannot believe
There's a God who feels pity for me;
Without Love's light my ship navigates
In the darkness . . .  and I'm lost at sea

And if it's a sin to renounce faith
In a God who cares,  then cast your stone!
No form of chastisement could be worse
Than this bitter pain of being alone

No one lives in this house anymore,
Long vacant, it fell into decay;
Once occupied by two loving hearts,
Now distant,  each gone its own way

Shall I tell you of the blissful nights
And days rich with joyous harmony??
If a tear or two runs down your cheek,
Feel no shame, weep along with me

I scarce can speak of things I have seen
Without tears welling in my eyes,
But was this not easy to predict,
Walking through the ruins of Paradise?

Try to imagine love's warming light
Spilling forth from each window pane;
Never mind the snow upon the sill,
Nor the gales that foretold pounding rain

This house had withstood many a storm,
This fortress with its stanchions of love;
Who knew that Fate would come blast the ledge,
Tumbling  it from its base with one shove!

Come, let's walk the garden one last time,
Does the silence not cause you to grieve?
The birds have left, not a flower blooms . . .
Perhaps it's best that we, too, should leave

I blow the coals, but they will not blaze,
Cold ashes upon a dead hearth lay
(How futile is the battle we wage
Against Fate, for it will have its way)

No one lives in this house anymore,
The window panes are cracked and broken;
The orchard is overrun with rot,
Love's final words have been spoken

Everchanging winds of discontent
Paint temptation an alluring hue;
Gilded words softly caress my ear --
O, what anxious impulses ensue!
But then something draws me back to you

Sweetest intimations tease my heart,
Drenching my thoughts like the morning's dew;
Invitations to romance entice . . .
Dare I venture down this avenue?
Certainly not!  let this thought pass through!

The flames of temptation stoke desires
That only fealty's promise can subdue;
But the embers must not be ignored --
If unguarded,  they'll blaze up anew
And soon unfaithfulness makes its debut

Lips that have been parched by burning sighs
Quiver when a fount comes into view;
How ardently I could quench my thirst,
How inviting this seductive brew . . .
But then something draws me back  to you

Temptation exudes such sweet perfume ---
How easily a vow can go askew;
But the door to my heart is secure,
And my conscience remains free of rue . . .
Your love's tender power binds me to you

I could count the grains of sand on the shore,
Through a straw, I could drink the sea dry,
But never could I stop loving you,
If commanded, I could not comply

I could move a mountain that blocked your view,
I could rearrange stars in the sky,
But never could I stop loving you,
It would be foolish for me to try

I could change the song of the birds at dawn,
I could dance on the flames of the sun,
But never could I stop loving you,
Certain deeds simply cannot be done

I could walk on water to come to you,
I could do anything that you ask,
But never could I stop loving you,
That would be an impossible task!

Live for today, just ignore tomorrow.
Why worry what the future may bring?
Nor dwell on a past that harbors sorrow.
For this day alone let the bells ring

While the hummingbird's feasting on nectar,
She's not concerned about foolish things ---
Tomorrow's plights don't seem to affect her
As she savors the gifts this day brings

So for every pleasure life sends your way,
Ring the bells and declare to the world
Those joyous moments that brightened your day.
(Who knows when Fate's wrath might be unfurled!)

And when Fate comes to sate its dark desire,
Grasp Fortitude's lyre and gently strum,
For while the dove sings with the sylvan choir,
Misery draws near, beating its drum

But mute that drum with hymns of gratitude ---
(Does the sun not always vanquish night?)
Tally the blessings this day has accrued . . .
Then let the bells ring with wild delight!

Come, my love, we've no time to waste,
The clock is chiming eleven,
Just enough time to get one last taste
Of the Sweet Elixir of Heaven

Autumn's love is no less sublime
Than Spring's first love, daring and grand;
But the hourglass has turned its last time .....
We must outrun Life's fast-falling sand

Pace cannot be arbitrary ---
The river is starting to freeze;
Hurry, my love, try not to tarry,
If you must, crawl on your hands and knees!

Love is calling in the distance,
Offering us her glorious shroud;
Lest she think we offer resistance,
Let us claim all the joy we're allowed

Autumn's last buds will soon depart,
As icy winds nip at the vine;
Soon nothing will stir this dying heart --
Neither love, nor song, nor vintage wine

Time is anxious to take its toll,
The sun's setting ..... let us make haste;
No longer at leisure can we stroll,
Come now, my love .... we've no time to waste!

Pursue your elusive dreams of love,
Rig the mast, set sail this very night,
Forge ahead, though the darkness blinds you,
Don't wait for day to restore your sight

You do not need to see things clearly,
For dreams are not beheld by the eyes,
That fire in your heart will be your guide
To find true love, wherever it lies

Dream of Eden before the gates closed
And two people sealed the fate of all;
Imagine the love that dwelt within!
(The secret still lies beyond that wall)

When the moon hides, don't curse the darkness,
Dare to steer your ship without a star;
Your dreams will guide you to love's fair shore,
Though the journey be tiresome and far

Take all your fantasies to the brink,
Let nothing inhibit your desires,
Stir the embers of your dying dreams,
Igniting all those forbidden fires

For dreaming is so much like praying -
Your heart cries out to some higher power
Begging for love you believe will come,
Though you know not the day nor the hour

And when your house of cards has fallen,
Don't let your heart sink into despair;
Remember, your dreams are what guide you,
So keep dreaming .... love will hear your prayer!

When Life's darkest clouds gather over me,
I seek shelter from impending storms;
Curtains are drawn closed, all the doors secured ---
And soon Life's grotesque profile transforms

Darkness spreads its arms like a faithful friend,
Offering comfort and asylum here;
(I'd rather not see what lurks in the light --
What we can't see we tend not to fear)

In my solitude, peace and harmony
Join to banish thoughts of bitterness;
Soon yesterday's pains fade and slip away ---
Precious gift of sweet Forgetfulness!

And should the anguish prove unbearable
My beleaguered soul succumbs to prayer;
Please, don't pity me . . . I've been here before . . .
Misery always seeks its darkest lair

But I find that Time, with its healing hands
Soothes and calms the tempests of the mind,
And from my shelter I emerge, renewed,
Leaving Life's most loathsome hours behind

O, grieving heart, cheer up and sing
Though love only stayed but a short while;
Soon you'll be drinking again from love's spring,
Forgotten will be love's cunning guile

O,  abandoned heart, dry your tears,
Crying will not bring back a lost love;
But reflect on the bliss of bygone years --
Memories are gifts from Heav'n above

O, broken heart, it's time to mend,
In due time you'll come to realize
New love may be waiting around the bend --
Be alert for blessings in disguise!

O, wounded heart, don't try to fly,
Dare not venture forth on broken wings;
Though love's warm glow fails to illume your sky,
Somewhere in the dark a bird still sings

O, mortal heart, your pain will end,
And from Life's shackles you'll be set free;
So let dead love to Heaven's throne ascend . . .
For love has its own eternity

What fires burn in this feverish mind!
And from the ashes spring ardent words,
Like the phoenix rising up to heaven,
Leading flocks of diaphanous birds

Mimicking the tides, thoughts ebb and flow
Ceaselessly, as those of the ocean;
Like one possessed, I surrender control,
Jotting down every whim and notion

Angst and rapture mingle together
As I ponder each new assignment;
Vague concepts, dispatched from a remote source,
Invade my mind, seeking refinement

Transient verses perch upon my pen,
Now my minions, I must guide them home;
With care, I place them upon the blank page --
Trumpeting the birth of a new Poem!

Dare I hope my words be remembered
Immortally, as our God must be,
Bringing joy and comfort to burdened hearts,
Like a prayer recited faithfully

My words cannot be held prisoners
In a box meant for decaying remains;
But rather, these poems I lovingly pen
Must soar alongside heavenly strains

I care not if few sad tears are shed
For my folded hands and eyelids closed;
But when Death commands that my voice be still,
Grieve for the poems that went uncomposed!

What artist has dared to lay his brush
Upon this canvas, and vainly strive
To paint life into a dying heart
That surrendered its will to survive?

Only a master would dare this feat,
This assignment so bizarre and rare:
Paint a woman starved of love and joy,
Without revealing her true despair

Study those eyes locked in a cold gaze,
As if hiding unbearable pain;
Who can surmise what hell burns within?
This mute painting will never explain

A tear-moistened smile rests on her lips,
Causing premonitions dark and bleak
To the viewer, who can only guess
What he might hear if those lips would speak

Her empty hands, resting in her lap,
Are clasped together as if in prayer;
Voiceless supplications rise unheard,
A deafening silence fills the air

What artist is this that chose to paint
What the uncaring Fates have decreed:
A life of unending loneliness,
A broken heart, ever meant to bleed

Great artist, your work is now complete,
A masterpiece of duality --
Despair and hope, laced with smiles and tears,
Obscuring her true identity

This painter who dared not sign his name,
Nor from this daunting task, seek release --
Surely, now you recognize his style
As you behold Misery's masterpiece!

Today the sun rose in a peculiar way,
As if it were afraid to announce the day;
First, with a cautious eye it scoured the land,
Coy, with a fear of unfounded reprimand;
Slowly its ribbons of light were unwinding,
But so pale, they could hardly be called blinding!
What could be the cause of the sun's hesitance?
What could possibly be prompting this reticence?
I wonder, did the sun hear my idle threats?
Last night, missing you, I was filled with regrets;
As the pain in my heart began to accrue,
I dreaded facing a new day without you,
And as the morning dawned, I said foolish things:
"How dare the sun rise, knowing the pain it brings!
Has it no compassion, just heartless cruelty?
I wish the sun would drown in a stormy sea!
Its flames be extinguished, leaving but embers,
Crying for the past glory it remembers.
What I wouldn't do to make the sun depart,
Too long it has thrown flaming knives at my heart!"
And so for my grief I cast blame on the sun
And wished for the day to be over and done;
Regretting my folly, I now realize
My words, spoken in angst, were cruel and unwise;
Fear not, Sun, nothing will harm your dazzling flame,
For my pain and loneliness, you're not to blame;
So rise, dear Sun, fill the world with your glory--
I'll reproach the Moon for my purgatory!

As clouds disperse along the eastern sky,
A reluctant sun slants its first ray;
No dew-kissed rose summons the thirsting bee,
Cheerless birdsong heralds the new day

How feeble and deficient this sunrise!
Once-resplendent beams now dimly glow,
And the bee, unable to sate his thirst,
To the wind murmurs his tale of woe

Nature's attuned to my pitiful plight --
(Love's absence disrupts life's harmony)
Though prayers prove fruitless, might Fate intercede . . .
Or is solitude my destiny?

What anxiety throbs within this breast!
(Once love and joy were the sole tenants)
Now, as I strain to hear love's distant voice,
Fear and doubt impose their harsh penance

Tendrils of gloom and desolation twist
'Round me tightly like a clinging vine,
Delivering a sense of foreboding --
Fear that love will never more be mine  

True, the future cannot be prophesied,
And so I keep vigil at Hope's gate;
Though doubt and despair mock my foolishness,
I've placed my trust in the hands of Fate

When the sun yawns its last farewell,
Lonely hearts plot their rendezvous;
Stay on the path that our dreams have blazed,
When darkness falls, I'll come to you

Silently, we'll greet each other,
For we must not disturb the moon;
He'll tell the sun of our escapade --
Dawn's light would end our tryst too soon

In our dreams love is gratified,
Its beauty totally revealed;
Even though distance prohibits touch,
Secret longings shall be unsealed

Though mutely we communicate,
My poet, my love, you know how
To weave your sweet words into a wreath,
Laying it gently upon my brow

And to your heart I'll render proof
Of the faithful love that you seek;
But I'll not disturb the silent night,
To touch your heart, I need not speak

And this night will bear witness to
A simple truth to which we're bound:
Our love transcends silence and distance,
All this confirmed ..... without a sound

Are there no words that I can say,
No supplication I might pray?
My tortured heart would be set free
If your love belonged to me

I'd write poems that would make you swoon,
Sonnets I've rehearsed with the moon;
Your soul would sing in ecstasy,
If your love belonged to me

When the sun leaves its golden throne,
I'd give you nights you've never known,
Like a tempest riding the sea,
If your love belonged to me

When the moon's silver rays unfold,
Won't you give me your heart to hold?
I would caress it tenderly,
If your love belonged to me

Calm the fear of what I most dread:
The words of love you've left unsaid!
You could end this uncertainty,
If your love belonged to me

The steepest hills for you I'd climb,
I'd travel to the end of time
If when I reached eternity,
Your love belonged to me

And yet again the night finds me alone
As this day slips into tomorrow;
Though my reason for happiness has flown,
Missing him is a beautiful sorrow

It may seem quite a melancholy task
Carrying this lost love to my grave;
Strangely, contentment wears many a mask --
His memory keeps me its joyous slave

All my gladness now dwells in yesterday,
Love's blissful past rests in twilight dreams
Where golden bees still sip the flower's spray,
And wild roiling seas become gentler streams

Time has purified the love we once shared,
In this realm of dreams there are no flaws;
Love thrives with a certainty never dared,
And is governed by joy's eternal laws

I now see his love through a different eye,
It lends greater comfort than before;
And the fear that his love may one day die
Lies in peaceful repose forevermore

Until this clay frame sets my spirit free,
I'll have memories from which to borrow;
Though seemingly strange my utterance may be,
Missing him is a beautiful sorrow!

I think I could have loved you,
O, how you stoked passion's fire!
Or was it just the madness of Spring
That kindled such wild desire?

Was my lantern's glow too faint
As our ships passed in the night?
Or perhaps Fate extinguished the flame
Before you could see its light

We may well have been lovers
If given the proper chance;
But why did the music stop playing
Before we finished our dance?

I put my mind at ease,
     banishing all things vile,
What good are memories
     that don't inspire a smile?

But now and then my heart
     forgets to lock the door,
And when the portals part,
     he's standing there once more

Of course, I can't deny
     him entry --- I'm too weak,
And yes, I know I'll cry
     with every lie he'll speak

It seems I never learned
     to let go of his hand,
Not all bridges were burned,
      love's flame might yet be fanned

O, foolish heart of mine,
     the truth is plain to see:
When love makes one resign
      itself to misery,
And every sleepless night
      is caused by love's deceit,
Can you ignore the Light
      of Truth there at your feet?

The time is long past due
      to set his memory free,
Let love's promise renew,
      let all sad feelings flee

Prepare the burial shroud,
      ensure the grave is deep,
Grieve one last time aloud . . .
     Now let the demons sleep!

I run out of patience, I run out of time,
Life's clock tells me I'm running out of years;
When my mind's weary,  I run out of rhyme,
Why is it I never run out of tears?

What was it that made me so bitter
Toward life and my very existence?
Might it be all those unanswered prayers
And God's unrelenting resistance?

What was it that caused this discontent --
A bountiful harvest, just wasted?
The grove that flowered, then went to seed,
Leaving the fruits of love untasted?

What made me choose to live in darkness
Rather than rekindle the spent flame?
Did I tire of seeing Love's light expire --
Just new photos in the same old frame?

What caused me to flee from Love's garden --
Was it Truth's orchard, beset with rot?
Or was it the daisy petals I plucked
That all ended with "He loves me not?"

What led me to finally realize
Nothing is what it appears to be?
Was it that vow of eternal love
That dissolved like foam upon the sea?

I've since learned to quell my eagerness
When Hope beckons with its radiant light;
I've abandoned foolish hopes and dreams
Knowing now that Fate decides our plight

While I wait alone for Love to come,
When I add all the parts, but can't get the sum,
When life overwhelms and I finally succumb .....
I dream

When I see no end to lonely days,
When rainbows are colored in black and grays,
And to the Lord of Love I can give no praise .....
I dream

When I call Love's name and no one replies,
When I look for you through tear-filled eyes,
When even the wind feels pity and sighs .....
I dream

When morning comes and the day is new,
But the pain is old, and I'm missing you,
When the sky won't don its cloak of blue .....
I dream

When I wish on a star and its light grows dim,
And birds no longer sing their evening hymn,
When the world is looking hopeless and grim .....
I dream

And I keep dreaming until my spirit soars,
Until my spirit reaches Heaven's doors,
And when there's no answer, although it implores .....
I dream

I'm needing Love like the rose, needing rain,
With bowed head awaits dawn's dewy cloud;
Her frail petals wither in distress
Beneath deprivation's brutal shroud;
So Love denies me its sacred balm,
Thrusting me among the loveless crowd

I'm needing Love like the stars need the sky
To recline in its endless caress;
So my lonely heart seeks a domain
Where sadness and pain dare not transgress --
A sanctuary where I'm absolved
From the tyranny of loneliness!

I'm needing Love like the birds need their wings
To worship from a loftier perch
Their God, who tends to their every need,
Yet, how vain and futile's been my search!
All my pleas for Love have gone unheard,
Doomed to die in a vacuous church

I'm needing Love just as Nature needs Spring
To rub Winter's long sleep from her eyes;
Please tell me that Love is sleeping, too,
And from its slumber it soon shall rise;
Tell me Love will come and carry me
Through the golden gates of Paradise;
Tell me! and then wait for the heavens
To resonate with my joyful cries!

When the heart refuses to forget
A love that left it in disarray,
And memories come knocking at the door
But the heart cannot turn them away
For it still worships at that secret shrine,
Try not to despair, everything will be fine

When petals fall from the withered rose,
And from its face fades the morning's glow,
The grief-stricken bee fondly recalls
The sweet nectar that once used to flow;
But when a new rose invites him to dine,
What bliss! for he knows everything will be fine

When dreams grow weak and struggle for breath,
In angst we cry "Why must it be so?"
But never discard your dying dreams --
Gather them close, and don't let them go!
Though in defeat we're tempted to resign,
If we persevere, everything will be fine

The mind and heart are but mortal things,
Subject to erosion and decay;
The haughty will is conquered by Time,
Old memories die and fade away;
But once we've made it to the finish line,
Peace awaits there, and everything will be fine

And the loved ones we have missed and mourned
Will bear witness to a simple truth:
Love does not die, but is eternal,
Like the golden fantasies of youth;
We'll witness Death's role in this Grand Design,
As angels chant "You're home now ..... everything's fine!"

Are you still recalling that dispute
You had days ago with a loved one?
It's time unkind words were rendered mute,
Lay them in their grave -- what's done is done

What anguish a quarrel can dispense!
A snide remark, then a **** reply;
Do those hurtful words still cause offense?
Bind them to swift wings and let them fly

Time alone cannot heal broken hearts
Or bring comfort to a shattered soul;
Gently gather all the broken parts,
Mend them with Love's threads to make them whole

Focus on the things that make you smile ---
Words and deeds that make happiness flow.
When bitter thoughts taunt you with their guile
Toss them to the wind and let them go!

How merry is the song that I sing,
How jubilant are the bells that ring,
How do I convey the joy they bring
When my darling speaks his words of love?

Like feathers his words float on the wind,
Bringing such joy, I fear I have sinned;
On this one man all my dreams are pinned,
No greater blessing can I think of

But when he's silent, I want to cry,
When I call and there is no reply,
I can't smile, no matter how I try,
Let him speak! I beg Heaven above

Anxiously I wait while the tears fall
When for days he speaks no words at all,
The thrill of past words  I must recall
Lest I die for want and lack thereof

And then the clouds part and angels sing,
O, what joy his words once again bring,
I would not trade them for anything,
When my darling speaks his words of love!

Love, please come find me, there's no time to waste,  
Heed the clock! It's chiming eleven ---  
Scarcely time to savor but one last taste  
Of the Sweet Elixir of Heaven  

Though Autumn's love would be no less sublime
Than the rapture Spring's love can command,
As Life's hourglass marks the passage of time,
I'm panicked by the fast-falling sand!

No longer can pace be arbitrary . . .
Hope's river will soon begin to freeze;
Hurry Love, do your best not to tarry,
If need be, crawl on your hands and knees!

Faintly I hear your song in the distance --
Your divine nocturne seducing me,
And I, in my desolate existence,
Can no longer abide patiently

Winter stands ready to enter the gate,
Reminding me of Life's shortening days;
Come light the flame, Love,  before it's too late,
Lest my tears of despair douse the blaze

Soon Death will scribe my name upon his scroll.
The sun is setting . . .  let us make haste;
No longer can you and I leisurely stroll.
Come quickly, Love, we've no time to waste!

What would my reaction be
If love appeared unexpectedly?
Would I be swept off my feet?
Would my glad heart skip a beat?
Or would I cower, then retreat?

Would my feet suddenly grow wings?
Might I utter foolish things,
And babble incessantly
Like a child with eager glee?
Might I become weak or giddy,
Provoking contempt or pity?

Would I think it's just a dream
Where fantasies reign supreme?
Would I find it quite sublime?
Or simply say "Well, it's about time!"
After waiting for love to appear,
Day after day, year after year

Would my face betray some doubt?
(Long ago, hope's flame burned out!)
Yet, passion still burns in my finger tips,
And desire, so fresh upon my lips

What would my reaction be
If love appeared unexpectedly?
I guess I'll just have to wait and see

How endearingly the flowers are held
In the arms of the nurturing soil;
Yet I'm condemned to walk without Love,
Wearied and spent by this hopeless toil

Confined behind bars of loneliness
I observe Love running wild and free;
What crime could warrant such punishment?
Even Hell knows no such agony

As the newborn babe that cannot speak
Cries out helplessly for what it needs,
So I cry for a harvest not granted,
. . . I cry for the unplanted seeds

And will Love's words remain unspoken?
Now the waves of Terror rise and fall!
Shall my heart stay an idle harbor . . .
Unworthy to be Love's port of call?

Having been born in Nineteen hundred forty-four,
Some say (and rightly so) I'm from "the days of yore;"
Wars were being fought, and the whole world seemed deranged,
Though many years have passed, the world's course has not changed;
But I know I have changed -- now with faltering sight
I search in vain for the dreams that never took flight

I was young once and focused on my golden dreams
Of romance, love, adventure . . . the very same themes
That you dream about, I still dream at this late stage --
So I know how you feel . . . we're on the same page;
Throughout life we reach for the brass ring, but at length
We have to admit we no longer have the strength

I understand now why back then old folks would speak
Of how "the spirit's willing, but the flesh is weak;"
And I yearn for the dawn of my life's yesterday
To once again pursue those dreams that went astray;
But the winds of Time are whispering a simple truth:
It's too late for me now . . . the spoils belong to youth

Why is it that petals fall from the rose,
Leaving only thorns upon the stem?
And why do lilies bend low to the ground?
It's so out of character for them

Well, roses know when love has deceived,
The petals they let fall are their tears;
Strangely, flowers can sense love's fickle ways,
In their own way, they vent mortal fears

And when lilies are seen bending their heads,
You can be sure they're in deep despair;
Love has once again shattered someone's heart,
Setting dreams adrift on sullied air

But Love will not be held accountable,
A free spirit -- thus it must remain,
Bringing unbelievable happiness,
Or rendering unbearable pain

And so I just glue the petals back on,
(The rose thinks my tears are morning's dew);
While I run a wire through the lily's stem,
I lift its head, and say "This love is true"

O, I'm aware such folly has its price --
Pretense stains life in a somber hue;
But when Love dons a dark, deceitful robe,
Just what is a broken heart to do?

So I start each day with my hope renewed,
Yet, anticipating old sorrow;
Full well I know as long as this life lasts,
A new love will find me tomorrow

And my life goes on - it's a brand new day,
Another rose is starting to bloom,
As I wait for petals to fall -- and they will,
I'll plant more lilies -- just in case -- if there's room

So God took a rib from Adam
And thus woman was created.
Could this be actual datum,
Or myth, highly overrated?

Through life man flounders (blamelessly)
When there's no woman at his side;
And a woman walks aimlessly
Until her mate's identified

I don't care how I came to be --
By grand hoax, or just a small fib.
But I can say with certainty
Being alone's not my cup of tea;
Somewhere, someone's looking for me --
Some poor Adam's  missing his rib!

Rays of a golden sun greet the day,
A warm breeze brushes my cheek in its play,
Fragrant flowers bloom in radiant hue,
Amidst this beauty, I think of you

A wandering bird in hectic flight
Searches for shelter before fall of night,
Then sanctuary comes within view,
When I've lost my way, I think of you

Amorous waves hug a lonely shore;
As avocets scavenge the sandy floor
The moon and stars keep their rendezvous,
In this peaceful realm, I think of you

A dove woos his mate high in a tree,
Together they warble love's symphony
As bees sip the rose's velvet dew;
Seeing love fulfilled, I think of you

Though life may demand its daily toll,
Your love guides me toward my journey's goal;
And when despair spreads its darkest hue --
Love's flame kindles when I think of you

I don't need the night to think of you,
And yet, when the sun's rays decline,
Suppressed memories make their debut
As my lips are moistened by the wine

Two ruby glasses sit on the sill,
(I fill your glass as if you were still here)
Into this red ink I dip my quill,
Resurrecting memories from their bier

Slowly I sip, alone in the dark,
While raking through the dying embers
Of memories, hoping just a spark
Will ignite as the wine remembers

A shadow moves across the wall,
One more sip .... now the flame's aglow,
Ghosts of love harken to the wine's call,
Passion has been stirred, let the wine flow!

I feel your breath, I can hear you sigh
As you gently take me in your arms,
Your trembling hand caresses my thigh,
The blessed wine is weaving its charms

To what depths will this sorcery go?
Shall I submit, or recoil in fear?
Must I dwell 'neath winter's dreadful snow .....
Or let you hold me treacherously near!

But soon the final sip will be drawn,
Then the wine will mock my aching heart,
All too soon you'll fade into the dawn,
Please, one last kiss before you depart

O, the wine imposes heavy dues!
With each sip, I'm deeper in its debt,
The wine remembers, but I must choose .....
Has the time come for us to forget?

The grains of sand grow fewer each day,
The task of the hourglass is at hand;
Shamed by poor decisions that paved my way,
Tears flow like pearls from a broken strand  

My heart was drowning in loneliness --
Ten fathoms deep, and still descending,
Crying mutely while sinking in distress,
Begging for a merciful ending

Then my heart was shaken to its core
And in golden laurels it was framed
When unexpected love knocked at the door,
Errant love, just begging to be claimed

Why did I not let my heart take flight?
Like a bashful ****** it waited,
With expectations of that wondrous night
When passion's hunger would be sated!

How clearly I see in retrospect
A foolish choice I could not then see;
Deprived of love, and weakened by neglect,
My heart now stands in judgement of me

These days, slow and labored is my stride,
As my conscience plots its alibi;
I found a place where my regrets can hide,
But loneliness vows to testify

Guilty! is the verdict that I hear --
For my folly, a price must be paid;
Eden's garden had never been so near,
With its fruits so temptingly displayed

Fraught with doubt, I turned his love away,
Sending hope back to its darkened lair;
And for this offense I face Judgement Day,
My wronged heart has no mercy to spare

Too often the lonely heart's dreams are hurled
Into the depths of despair's roiling sea;
But soon it finds peace in a phantom world
Of shadows mimicking love's ecstasy

Why should Loneliness conjure up such fears?
When I feel alone, with no direction,
I need only gaze in my pool of tears
And I'm comforted by my reflection

In the night I may wander paths unknown
With the luster of the moon to guide me;
Pity me not, thinking I walk alone --
My shadow walks faithfully beside me

A Spring morning may find me wading rills
In a vale where the meadow rue stands tall;
I cry "I love you" to the distant hills,
And some phantom lover echoes my call

Or I may write a torrid love letter,
In a bottle I'll cast it to the sea.
What joy to be freed of despair's fetter
When the tide returns that missive to me

Curse of loneliness! no such thing need be.
But how do we bear the pain? you may ask;
Look to desperate hearts for the remedy,
Our senses have been well-trained for the task!

So what if love proves to be untrue --
Are we not accustomed to its lies?  
Long ago deceit made its debut 
And left its reflection in our eyes

So what if the night denies us sleep    
While we wring our hands, pacing the floor;
Yes, the cruel ploys of love make us weep,
And yet we keep coming back for more

So what if we embrace every lie --
How sweetly they fall upon our ears!
Is it prudent for us to deny
Love a chance to turn the tide of years?

So what if we keep taking that leap
Of faith, praying each new love will be true;
The hills we climb each day seem less steep,
And Heaven's portals well within view

So what if love makes us play the fool?
Better we find solace in a dream
Than to tie the rope and kick the stool . . .
And dawn finds us dangling from the beam!

When sad, empty eyes chance to rest upon
Other eyes fixed in a hopeless gaze,
What sweet fantasies overrun the mind--
Navigating love's enchanting maze

How the pulse quickens when love is the prize,
Like dried kindling, hope begins to burn;
But what pain when one heart greedily feasts,
And for the other shows no concern

What a dilemma when only one heart
Lights the darkness with love's burning flame;
Merciless anguish does not spare the rod
When Love's endeavor is put to shame

For what is the mainstay of caring hearts
If not love that's given in return?
Just as a candle's flame must extinguish
When there remains no wick left to burn

I've heard it said love begets love, and yet
Love's hunger still courses through my veins;
So my starving heart forages for crumbs
In Love's graveyard of decaying  remains

Unrequited love always takes its toll --
A forbidding toll each heart must pay;
Love cannot survive without sustenance,
Weakened by neglect, it fades away

The steps to my grave grow fewer,
I'm told now it's just a stone's throw;
But I've yet to carry the Torch of Love
And stand in awe beneath its hallowed glow

Too many were the lonely nights
I knelt with despair so near me,
Praying for love with the faith of a child,
Foolishly believing God would hear me

Tell me, Lord, can you hear me now?
Why have my cries not reached your door?
Each day fresh wreckage is strewn o'er my life,
But your silence is what it was before

The Book of Life's last page has turned,
The present hour now holds the keys;
Little time remains to learn of Love's joys --
When Death summons, I'll have no need for these

Can you hear me now? Give me hope
Before my heart heaves its last sigh;
Will my barque ever journey on Love's sea,
Or with furled sails in port forever lie?

Though despair stretches its talons,
The voice of hope affirms its place;
As the Scroll of Life dolefully unfolds,
Have lines been penned that Fate might yet erase?

Foolish heart, hopeful to the end,
As Death guides the gravedigger's plow:
Dig deeper, deeper, stifle that ****** voice!
But my heart still cries ..... can you hear me now?

Pondering the gnarled vineyards at twilight,
   it is for their rare fruit that I long.
The vines have survived many a drought and blight,
   rendering them sensitive but strong

The fruits of old love are tender and sweet,
   having  learned to endure sun and shade;
Gleaning fortitude from gales, snow and sleet,
   their true value's been measured and weighed

Old love seeks the beauty that veils the heart --
The wrinkled face and the graying hair
  matter not;  Yet, what a sting they impart
  to the lonely caught in Time's cruel snare

Observe the pearl fishers -- they're not concerned
   with the oyster's shell, but with the prize
   that's dwelling deep inside, for they have learned
   precious gems lurk in cunning disguise

Satisfying are the fruits of old love ---
   so patiently they wait to be claimed
   by soft, wizened hands, gentle as a dove,
   yet revealing passion, unashamed

Because of all the sorrows and the tears
   and the many heartaches left untold,
   love that has withstood the test of the years
   is a love that's worth its weight in gold

How blessed are we who can see love's sweet truth
   unfolding before our very eyes;
We don't need the exuberance of youth
   to yield to love's call 'neath star-filled skies

Old love has had its feet held to the fire,
   and it emerged, still able to stand;
It survived the bogs of life's muck and mire . . .
What more can be said?  Old love is grand!

Ask, if you will, for my hand to hold
As the day withdraws its golden light;
And no, I will not think you too bold
Should you ask me to stay through the night

If it is a song you need to hear
To help put your restless mind at ease,
I shall place my lips close to your ear
And hum softly in angelic keys

When seeds of despair become full blown,
Together you and I will tame them;
My strength and loyalty are yours to own --
You need only reach out to claim them

I would let my blood course through your veins,
And my breath in your chest rise and fall;
Any strategy that yet remains
Shall be rendered at your beck and call

Love spares nothing, but must give the whole
Of its being to impart its sweet bliss;    
So my heart, my life, my very soul
Are yours . . . but I'll give no more than this!

Is it by Divine grace few pass through life
Eluding pain, with scarce a trace of strife,
While others are slaughtered by Fate's sharp knife?
How the tears fall as misery runs rife!

When the tattered flags of war are unfurled,
With every bullet and bomb that is hurled,
When on battlefields, blood and soil are swirled,
I cry for the wickedness in this world

I feel the woes of each abandoned heart
As the barbs of loneliness sting and smart;
And while Destiny play its chosen part,
Helplessly I watch, and then the tears start

I cry for the pain of each living thing,
The warbler that struggles, but cannot sing,
A queen's bittersweet reign without her king;
And yet, what benefit do such tears bring?

Though vague longings stir when evening is nigh,
We're condemned to sorrow, my heart and I;
Then dread overtakes, and O, how I cry,
Yearning for the love Fate chose to deny

Wasted tears, why do you fall from my eyes?
Just force of habit, I must surmise,
As Life delivers what Hell ratifies . . .
Pain and wasted tears . . . in endless supplies

I'm needing you like a rose needs the rain  ---
Her relief from the sun's burning shawl;
In mute despair she implores the sky,
Begging mercy with her silent call;
And O, what joy when that errant cloud
Hovers o'er,  and the rain starts to fall!

I'm needing you like a bird needs its wings
To ascend to a loftier perch
To scan the skies for its missing mate
In its frantic and desperate search;
(When the object of worship is absent,
How meaningless the choir and the church)

I'm needing you like the tide needs the shore
To find respite from the raging sea;
O, I need you in so many ways --
This rant could go on endlessly;
But should these words fail in their intent . . .
How incompetent my poetry!

The sun rose, its duties to uphold
In its usual, most resplendent manner,
Spreading glorious rays of orange and gold -
Proud it rose, wildly waving its banner;
I was not stirred by this gaudy display,
For I find no joy since he went away

Listen to those songbirds in the tree,
You would think they'd find something better to do
Than to warble amidst such misery
On this Earth, overgrown with weeds and rue!
O, forgive my tone, so doleful and grim,
But I find no joy being without him

And why does the moon glow so brightly .....
Does it not know darkness helps me to forget?
Was ever a lantern so unsightly!
Throwing its rays without any regret;
Such indifference causes me agony,
For I find no joy since he's not with me

But life goes on as it did before,
And Earth will continue to orbit the sun,
And my heart will break just a little more
Finding myself alone when day is done -
Peace and hope no longer in my employ,
Being without his love I find no joy

Love, fly homeward to my heart once more,
Come wash away the memory of the day
You left me standing alone on Love's shore
While Sorrow's ebb tide swept my joy away;
Should Angels whisk me to their sacred lair,
I'll find no joy unless I find you there

As thoughts tumble from my pen,
Who is collecting the words,
Scrutinizing, dissecting them,
Until they cry like wounded birds?

Let the words be as they fall,
Don't change their identity;
Drenched in tears or writhing in pain,
They're my feelings, finally set free

Please don't question my intent,
Each word was chosen with care,
Not born of whim or wanton chance --
What you see is my heart stripped bare

While the coals of passion burn,
Slowly, back and forth I rake,
Purposely I disturb their sleep
Until the ashes are awake

Don't search for hidden meanings,
There are no encrypted codes,
Just feelings, repressed and smothered
Until each emotion explodes

Look more closely at my words --
Transparent as summer's rain;
Don't interrupt their fragile voice,
Although you're tempted, please refrain!

No longer will sadness set the tone,
Despair won't define my waking hours;
Never will the sun hear me bemoan
Lonely tears that cascade like Spring showers

To solitude's woes I'll not be bound
As long as the sun saunters the sky;
Like vile weeds I'll pluck them from the ground,
Laughing as their flowerheads droop and die

Love's silent voice will be disavowed
Since it will not speak the words I crave;
In defeat my head will not be bowed,
To Love I'll not be a faithful slave

I'll mimic the music box dancer,
Twirling 'round and 'round in silent glee,
While secretly begging the answer
To why Love withholds its melody

All throughout the day I'll wear a smile,
Every tortured longing will take wing;
I'll defy Fate's decree all the while,
But when night falls ..... well,  that's another thing!

Though I love you, I am not blind
To your faults, but I let them pass;
I find contentment in your garden,
Though a few weeds grow among the grass

I was not blind when the blight came
To our orchard, rotting the fruits;
Yet, our tree grew stronger than before,
For deep and unblemished were the roots

Love is not blind . . . how clearly I see
The beauty of your heart and your soul,
So I choose not to sort good from bad,
But view your love as the perfect whole

Love is too precious to analyze ---
If we're blessed with love, let us give praise
While overlooking our loved one's faults,
Judging not their flaws in measured ways

In a secret chamber of your heart
Let the flame of forgiveness burn bright.
What joy seeing love's tender buds unfold
As the bitter memories take flight!

And so I believe love is not blind,
Though at times it has to make a choice
To close its eyes, pretend not to see,
And be guided by its inner voice