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I had always prided myself on my strength
The fact that I survived multiple abuses
And still didn't break

I told you about it all
The beatings I received
The ****
And the hopelessness I felt everyday

You promised me sanctuary and I was cautious at first
You gained my trust
And quenched my love thirst
You made me feel safe
As you slowly burrowed into my soul

The manipulation, like a slow acting poison
Rotted me from the inside out
And by the time it was obvious
I was already under your control
And already falling down

I always prided myself on getting right back up
But your hold on me and abuse
Was such a mind ****
And I'm stuck

Even after I broke free from you
The roots of your control were still buried in my soul
And to this day, you make me the weakest
And you make every ray of sunshine the bleakest

I'm so paranoid
And so confused
I mix up pure love
For someone trying to abuse
And I'm trapped here
Forever pretending to be the same old me
So strong and so brave
But my unbreakable heart is starting to cave
I want you to want me.
With raw, unweavering power, I want you to want me.
I want my scent, my voice, to dance whimsically into your senses.
I want my face, my body, to creep into your memories.
I want you to want me as if your very life is dependant upon my touch.
I want you to want me as if you were addicted to the taste of my lips.
I want you to want me in the way that I'm always wanting you.
I want you to want me in the way that I never stop thinking about you.
I want you to want me with a  passion that burns hotter than hellfire itself.
I want you to want me with needs more intense than the wind and rain that falls from the heavans.
I want you to want me.
Tell me, can you still break a heart once it stops beating?
Food for thought.
 Jan 2016 Lexi Rigg
ZL
smoke
 Jan 2016 Lexi Rigg
ZL
White smoke
I slowly inhale
for I am in no rush to
make it to HELL.
 Jan 2016 Lexi Rigg
KellzKitty
Write a man a poem he will feel appreciated and flattered
Write a boy a poem and he will shut you down and leave you tattered
Tell a man you love him, he'll say it back with truth
Tell a boy you love him, he'll use it as a gateway to rip off your clothes
Show a man affection, He'll respect you forever
Show a boy affection and to him it will never matter
Spend your money on a man, oh wait a man doesn't want you to do that
However a boy will strip you of everything you've ever had
The difference between a man and a boy is a great one indeed
A man will cherish you forever
While a boy will take what he wants and then leave
 Jan 2016 Lexi Rigg
Timothy Ward
a sweet uncertain
future awaits
us all my friend
please
teach me
to forgive my
yesterdays
oh the pain
oh the pain
yet again
yet again
teach me
to forgive
dear friend
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