I have the keys
The keys to every door
All of them have labels
Love
Life
Friendships
Relationships
Money
***
Success
I'm convinced someone keeps changing the locks

Can you feel the ache in my chest?
Can you touch the cracks in my heart?
Can you tell where my soul begins,
And where it's been torn all apart?

I'm made of sharp edges and pieces fit with super glue
Can you feel it?
I'm a heartless enigma and a soulless slice of truth
Can you feel it?
Enemies make the best friends and now I hate you
Can you feel it?

Lies are like a bullet to my heart, filling me with holes
A feeling of emptiness overwhelms me, a space too bold
Trying to hold on tight to a tangle too tied to unfold
Lost in a web of pain too damaged to be controlled

I'm made of broken glass, chipped and shattered
Can you feel it?
I'm an empty shell of something that once mattered
Can you feel it?
Pieces are falling, a love now bruised and battered
Can you feel it?

The harmony of injustice is ringing in my ears
A lullaby of sweet nothings and my childhood fears
A common trend unfolds, a chorus of chants and tears
A pain ripples through my body and the monster finally appears

Can you feel it?

I witnessed a breathtaking sunrise this morning
So very pretty that one glance made me smile, and it reminded me of your smile, and it made me think of you
Just the other day I watched a person do something very kind for someone they did not know, my heart swelled, and my tears welled, and it made me think of you
I heard of joke the other day that made me laugh so hard my belly ached, but in a good way, then I remembered your infectious laugh, and it made me think of you
I saw a fancy sports car with curvy sleek lines that made it look like it was going a hundred miles an hour sitting still, then I stared to imagine you driving it, and it made me think of you
Through my travels I encountered a bouquet of roses, so I reached for a smell, they were lovely sweet, and I started to think of the wonderful perfume you wore just for me, and it made me think of you
I layed my head down to sleep last night and I noticed how soft my pillow was, and as I snuggled up to it I remembered snuggling with you, and it made me think of you
I watched a movie just the other day where the world was being destroyed, a man was risking his life to save the woman he loves, as I watched I began to fantasize the man was me, and the woman was you, and it made me think of you
I took a deep breath today, and as I felt my chest rise and my lungs began to fill with life giving air, I wished my heart could fill up too, except with your presence, and it made me think of you.

Is only a name.
But naming is
Like timing,
Spacing,
Teasing
Loving -
A carving
In chaos.

© LazharBouazzi, February 14, 2017

I'm sorry for hurting you, like the way I do
I'm sorry for the hurtful things I always say to you
We know the fight will never last
but still the amount they do
I'd like to say I'm sorry for everything I put you through.
It kills me when we fight, and it scares me too
I always make you cry and it kills me when you do
As I write this now, I know this much is true
I love you with all my heart and will always be with you.
I did not mean to hurt you
But there wasn’t much I could do
I had no option but to lie
I know that made you cry
I know I broke your trust
Don’t let our relationship bite the dust
I beg you, I sincerely pray
Please forgive me for the that fateful day.
Second chance for us is all that I want.

Listening to loud music all the time

Nightmares every time you close your eyes

Talking even though no one is listening

Screaming without making a sound

Fake a smile, pretend to laugh

Slowly dying inside

Reaching a hand out for help

A hand full of scars, visible or not

Pushing your friends and family away

And befriend your inner demons instead