In my apartment I often hide
Catching glimpses
Of nature that exists outside

Deeply rooted the trees remain dignified…
They know it’s not them
But the people who have me terrified

Sometimes being authentic
Is allowing yourself
To be who you are
Even when who you are
Is someone really special

i walk along the shoreline
filled with the familiar need to disappear
the emptiness beckons me
it plays its rushing melodies
temptation drawing me in
shame pushing me out

crouching forward
i press my palms into the earth
cool and damp
beside the water i now lay
i pull myself in closer
curled up so tightly
i dissolve into sand

I know that I am doing just fine
But I still think of you from time to time

It's been a year since first we spoke
Since we shared your favourite smokes

I'm half way through my first degree
Your intellect still inspires me

The pain is dull but remains the same
Seeking the closure that never came

It's like I'm in The Twilight Zone
No longer seeking someone to call my own

It's simple, yet strange to see
That this is what you did to me

I am grateful knowing I don't need anyone
There will never be another to hurt me and run

But there are times I think of you
And they ****, they really do

There was a light I no longer know
From when I believed that love could grow



I miss the times when I believed...
That there was something bigger than me

This morning
I dreamt of you
I can't help but ask...
Did you dream of me too?

We took refuge
In a fort in a tree
With Minecraft t-shirts
And cartoons on the TV

My nose was pierced
But I took it out
There was nothing but certainty
No feelings of doubt

Your hands traced
Over my body
It was the first time we had
That kind of intimacy

I felt the freedom
When you entered me
Kissing deeply
And giggling light heartedly

We tried the position
You always wanted to
I laid down
My back to you

It was when I turned over
Playing the little spoon
That I heard my neighbour
Coming home too soon

As the door slammed
I knew it was fantasy
I still felt my hand on yours
Resting on my hip gently

Falling from the astral plane
Feeling like celestial being
I took a dive from the stars
It felt like my soul was torn from yours

I crashed into my body
Tears in my eyes
I swear to God you were with me
Soaring above those skies

"There are others,
Don't worry, just wait and see!"
There are others they say,
So patronizingly

Yes, there are others,
Lots of fish in the sea,
Lots of others that are
Cookie cutter debris

"You'll meet someone perfect,
they are waiting for you!"
I met the one I want
He just didn't want me too

Am I too forthcoming,
Or not giving enough?
Can it be my dreams
Are too far to touch?

Why must I lay,
So empty in my bed?
Imagine the glory of my lips
Wrapped around your ****'s head

I liked you
I thought you liked me too
                 I liked you
I didn't need wine to pull through

I liked you
But I was a fool
                 I liked you
I just couldn't play it cool

I liked you
And it was easy, you see
                 I liked you
You said it yourself, you were another version of me

I liked you
Now all that has changed
                 I liked you
I'll date dudes and won't care about their names

I liked you
You were so complimentary
                 I liked you
Until you let me fall empty

I liked you
As Icarus for you were the sun
                 I liked you
You taught me to burn them and run

I liked you
It's clear now to see
                 I liked you
I'll destroy them all before they destroy me