lullabies laced with lies
i sang them everyday
convincing you and everyone else
but i let the truth decay
said i no longer cared
and at the moment i really didn't
but deep down inside
i knew i couldn't believe it
because at the end of the day
i really did care
but i knew it would hurt you
and it was a truth i didn't want to bear
i wanted to push it away
and appear the perfect person
but after so many mistakes
it's about time i learn my lesson

s.s

you used to be my blue sky
on cloudy days.
now when i think of you
all i can imagine
is thunderstorms.
i dont understand
where we went so
******* wrong.
change is inevitable.
our ending was inevitable.
i know one day
i'll forget you
and you'll forget me.
i pray to god that you find
your blue sky,
just as i wish to
find mine.
and i'm sorry that
it couldn't be you.

Have you ever walked on
broken glass before?
I'm sure most of you
would say no, but
do you really think
you haven't?
Have you ever gotten
out of bed with your
broken heart so heavy
it feels like its hanging out of
your chest?
Have you ever walked
around in public smiling
even though you know
your funeral was the day prior?
Have you ever drove
through the place you guys
used to love the most and
all you can see is ghosts?
This is walking on
broken glass.

The first time they call you names,
Leave.
The first time they make you feel worthless,
Leave.
The first time they hit you,
Leave.
The first time they leave you,
Don't go back.
The first time they take your life away,
Leave.
The first time you feel like you would be
better off on your own, than with the
person you love,
Leave.

He will leave you
when he's finished with you.
After he's done raging war
on your life.
He will be fine.
He will not know that
you sit in the shower
scrubbing all the places he touched
you
trying to wipe away his finger prints.
Until your skin can't take it anymore.
He will not know that every bruise
he left you
with every hit
every name that was called
is still healing
on the inside and out.
He will not know that you are picking
up all the pieces he left
and trying to put that back together.
He never cared for you.
He never will.

I didn't miss you right away.
After you left i was sad, yes,
but i knew i didn't miss you.
I was thinking positively about the future
and after how bad you ruined me
i thought there was no way i could miss you.
I was wrong.
About two weeks after you left
you never called
you never texted.
I think i expected one of them
and i clung to that,
so thats why i didn't miss you.
But now that i haven't heard from you
i know its real.
You're gone.
And **** do i miss you.
I miss your smell
I miss the way you would rub
my neck when
we were in the car.
And i hope you found someone
to reassure you about your insecurities,
because i know your OCD would always
get to you.
And when you left i asked you
who was going to tell you
your glasses weren't crooked after
you asked for the millionth time.
I told you that you wouldn't have anyone to
hold at 3am to keep you warm.
It's been 12 days since the last time you
held me.
I feel really lost right now because i miss you,
but i know time heals all wounds.
Hopefully one day when I'm driving
through a pretty town
while the sun goes down
i won't think of you.