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Josue cruz Sep 2015
I have alot of things to remember
One of them was with you
You allways made me happy
I loved it when we went to the fair in september
And when we swam in the pool
I remember when we though obout you as a granny
There where times we would fight but it was allways cool
I loved the way you looked in those black tights
I miss being with you
I love these memorys of you
But I need to forget them soon
Josue cruz Sep 2015
Stresed about the many different duties
Making money is no problem
I just cant make it out the lining
Whenever I see us it makes me sad
I just cant see the life we had
My eyes are binded
Havent seen the support you used to have
Why does life make me mad
Havent made enough for the dream we had
No one likes it when your perfect
I cant even make you mine
But the men your with make me *******
Why cant you just accept me for the real me
All you want is money thats no problem
Come with me
Be with me
Why do you have an issue
I have no issues just
stay with me
Josue cruz Sep 2015
Fear is on my mind
Thinking about whats on in life
Never stop thinking about the reaper
Who he gonna ****** next
My life is a mix of depts
Plus im never really up to something
Ima go help the world thats exciting
My momma told me show no fear
Wait till I tell her what i make a year
No wonder my brothers choose the savage life
I cant even pay my fines
Starting to feel like theres no love
My only wish is to make it rico
Allways regret the things I do
Never really stoped feeling like a tool
I'll never make myself happy
My minds like a wheel of fortune
Allways lands on depressed
Ive been feeling like a fool
Maybe I cant make it here
Someone said stop that youll regret it
Made me feel like a hundred bentlys
Want to stop the gates and shut the doors but the things are allready on the floor
All my friends just turned away
This all made me raise the stakes
Shut the door
Im alone
Thats what I allways hate
Josue cruz Sep 2015
Life is all about risk
Josue cruz Aug 2015
When i was a kid they told me i was not so normal
I couldnt understand why so many people looked at me so funny
Like as if I werent even formal
Growing up they gave me the nick name bunny
I was as smart as i was quick
Allways did things like a dart
But as people began to know me they ran saying I was sick
Some said I was mental
So I began to be real slick
Started robbing when i was nine
Because my dad left me at the age of five
Momma allways told me look at the world and tell it everytime you can
Im a fine man
And i cant be knocked about
So I steped up and made every dream come true
Even though many told me to kick the can
I said look at me now I drew the plan
But even though I was a success
I knew throughout the years i was still so so sick
Then one night after 2 or 3 shots
I came down felling I was blessed
But the anger that was in me would never really rest
I made bullet holes through the walls that went chick chick chick
I will allways be crazy inside
Josue cruz Aug 2015
Life is long
Then suddenly ding ****
Your time is up
You look back at all you've done
As you go up
The memories you've had are long
Some make you laugh
Some make you cry
But then it hits you
You ran out of time
Then you try to pry down but you cant its too late
You wanted to at least make one more memory before it was too late
Then you see all you left behind and you start to worry
But this is your fate
How sad it ended this way
My lesson to you is dont waste your time
Josue cruz Jul 2015
Life has given me many situations and different types circumstances
But the fact that I keep going through problems instead of making my way around them puzzles me
Why do I keep telling myself and others im fine when questioned
Even I know most of the time I'm just kidding myself as soon as I respond
Why do I keep trying to chase after a goal that seems impossible not just that also disappointing to me if accomplished
I can say its because I want whats best for me my family and others or maybe its what I allways dreamed of doing but even better its my goal in life or its what I've set out for
These are all just ways to cover up how we really feel about life and the things we want to accomplish
I'll tell you the truth on why I set out to accomplish things
I go through diversity just to impress my step dad the only father figure I will ever know
I try hard and been trying scince I was a teenager
But even though I try hard just to receive some fatherly love he still thinks I'm a lying disrespectful unworthy stupid *******
I try to impress my mom
A women who has never paid any attention to me and has abandoned me throughout my life coming and going whenever she feels like it
I try to hard tell my self I'm perfect because in this dark and hurtful world my self-esteem is hurt bad and I don't want it to fall any lower
I try to hard to make sure my daughter doesn't fall like I did so she doesn't feel as if her life has been a total failure
I try to hard make something of my self seeing as i could not have came to the world any lower
This is why I try
These are reasons we try
To fix things we dont like to protect people we care about to get things we never had
This is how we really feel but never express
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