We kissed
And it wasn't gradual.
We kissed
And it was not casual
We kissed
And it wasn't rational
But we kissed
And kissed
I forgot how good I am at this.

I want to drown in ***

Wallow in tequila

Suffocate in bourbon

And by the time I fall asleep

I’ll forget about you

And when I wake

I’ll celebrate with mimosas,

Her name far away from my tongue
And you still would not notice

Because your beer

With two X’s

Will kiss me and keep me intoxicated

Until I pop two fizzes

Seltzer and sober

And I’ll remember

Why I never wanted to fall in love

You look at me
But you don't see me
You hear me
But you don't listen
You touch me
But you can't feel me
So tell me,
How can you love me at all?

I love you and I miss you. And I love you and miss you constantly. And I fall asleep with the thought of your right arm loosely around my waist and your left arm underneath the pillows, your hand slightly entangled with mine. I can feel my legs slightly intertwined with yours, finding comfort in the fact that this is my favorite embrace. This thought will help me sleep. But then I am aware of my thoughts when I am with you. You know? I'm in my bed thinking about what I think about when I'm sleeping with you. And as though I am there, I feel and hear everything. I can see the light from the TV casted onto the walls and ceiling and i am aware of my blinking. I can hear you drift off into sleep. You begin to breathe shallow and then start to snore that tiny lawn mower snore, and I know that you're not consciously here, or is there? And I start thinking about how lucky I am. How amazing you are. And how much I don't want to sleep just so I can cherish this moment for as long as possible.
I can imagine looking over you, your clock and reading it. 3 in the morning already. I should sleep. And I feel my eyelids growing heavy and by this time the movie is over and the room turns dark and I know I know I know that I should sleep. But I'm so afraid. I'm so afraid that if I sleep, I'll find out I was dreaming. Because to find out that you are just a dream would be a nightmare. So I scoot in a bit closer and kiss your hand and I try to feel everything before everything goes dark. And then it's morning. And you're still there. Or is it here?
And I think about all of that while I'm in my bed and feel everything. Diluted. But it's still screaming with feeling and seeing. And I can barely sleep. But I know I know I know I should sleep.

The rain came in rivers
Flooded the streets
Trees and debris everywhere
Up to my knees
In the sky's sorrow
I couldn't wait
"Till tomorrow"
To borrow your heart
I swam the roads
That overflowed
My heart for yours is what I owed
And at the crossroad
There was no water
No flood
No trees or debris
Up to my knees
Just you
Only you
Always you

you said,
I'm losing her
and still,
you did nothing
to keep me

there is no need to defy gravity
when all I want is to define it
as something that pulls you closer to me
and me closer to you
an inward force of the both of us
that the gods of physics
wrote into our chromosomes
You can be the sun and moon
and you can orbit 'round me
and me 'round you