Quarter till midnight
And there’s no one around
But the loudness of my thoughts
How did I end up here?
Lost
and without a soul who cares
Insomnia bordering on insanity
You seem to think
You’re the only one hurting
But guess again
The voices are louder now
And you aren’t here to stop me
From wreaking havoc on myself
And destroying every inch
Until there is nothing left
No remnants of the soul who broke you
No pieces to repair of the shattered mind
Nothing but ash
Praying devoutly that someday I will return
The Phoenix risen and renewed
The flames filled with rebirth
The flight guided by hope
That was once believed to be extinct

Wanting so desperately
To give myself to you
Lost in the idea
That this might unfold
The way we’d hoped
Dreaming out loud
About the future
Knowing tomorrow
Is never guaranteed
Because we’ve been here before
Caught in the crossroads
Of who we are
And who we used to be
Searching the seams of each other
Hoping to find meaning
In the passion of your kiss
An explosion of sorts
Where our mouths crash
And the tide rises within us

During an experience, I feel your presence wrap it’s warm arms around me
And for a moment I am safe
For a moment you are here
Only to be dragged back to reality, kicking and screaming
There is no denying that this is how things are now
I am alone
And that doesn’t mean that I’m lonely
But it does mean I’m without you
And like a phantom limb, I am often reaching out of habit
Only to find empty space
Where your hands once were

I was blinded, stunned,
by a thousand bright suns.

A star so young and charming
raised my spirit to never known highs.

But the sparkle only lasted moments
for my courage descended into night.

When it comes to you
I am at a loss for words
so my heart beats in symphonies
my mind will never compose

When you were younger,
you were told about the pain of a broken heart
you were told about the mean people
you could find along your path
yet, you were not told about
the dark holes that
can find home
in the deepest part of you

You were not told that
one day you might wake up
feeling nothing but lost
lost in the outer space of your existence
where gravity doesn’t exist
and you are just floating around
looking for a path
you think will lead to the brightest star

The truth is, you keep floating around and around
you see millions of stars
but somehow
you can’t seem to reach them
no matter how further you stretch your arms,
you can’t get to touch them
and even when you are finally
so close to them
they turn into deep black holes that
with all their strength
pull you around them
only to eventually devour you

and this
over and over again
until you get used to it
until you get used to feeling this lost and consumed
until you forget how to feel full