She was washing dishes,
Putting things away,
Glad for a little quiet after the fray,
Hospital bills would be coming,
Juggling bills to pay,
But she was glad for the quiet today.

Sam came in with dirt on his face
From playing "trucks" on the drive,
And trailing a gritty wet trail
For a cookie or two and some milk with his Mom.

She milk-dunked an Oreo
Looked at her son, and said,
"What shall we do for today?"
To the  milk-mustached boy
Who'd barely made it to five.

"How 'bout checkers?" he asked,
And she looked hard at him,
"Where did you learn how to play?"

"At the doctor's," he said,
As he dipped cookies in,
And startled his mother again.

"Honey, who taught you to play?"

"Max and I played. He showed me how,"
He said with a straight, serious face
As she spilled the milk from her glass.

"Honey, Max has been gone for two years!"

"I know, Mom, and now he is six, and not three.
In heaven, you get to decide.
And Grampa and Gramma came up to say hi,
And numbers were swirling around."

She paused, now uncertain, and mopping up milk,
"So did you see Jesus?" she said.

"Yup, Jesus was there. He said I could visit,
but I had to go back," Sam looked at her matter of fact.
"Can I go play now?" And outside he went,
Brown smudges still stuck on his chin.

At lunch
My friend told me his dream:
"Jesus, my dad, and I
Were sitting by a fireplace,
Comfortable on soft leather chairs...
And we were smoking.
Dad had his pipe,
I was smoking a cigar,
And so was Jesus."

He laughed;
So did I...
Dreams can be absurd.

"I looked at Dad,
Said, 'You know,
You made my life miserable
Some times'...
And then he looked at me...,
'You made my life
Difficult, too.'"

He stopped and looked hard at me.

He'd had an Epiphany in his dream;
I saw the look in his face:
A coming to terms,
A sort of peace,
An understanding,
A sadding sorrow,
A letting go.

I remembered what he'd told me
When I had shared a dream...
My dreams are only about me...
Not about the people in my dreams.

My introspection ended
When he laughed...
"But that's not all!
We three looked up,
Somehow partners in the dream,
To see mother standing at the door,
And we, all three,
Slid our smokes down to the side
To hide them near the floor."

The twisting tale took us then,
And others in the coffee shop
Looked up from smart phones
To see two Frenchmen laughing.

She grabbed the coattails of his jacket,
Begging her daddy not to leave.
He shrugged the wool garment off,
And bending to his knees:
"Darling, don't cry,
You keep this for me--
God knows you will need it
More than I will need."
Again he turns to leave,
This time clad in green;
"Daddy, I will keep a promise
If you promise me to:
Stay safe and come home--
I will return this coat to you."
He paused, turned, and smiled,
And kissed her little head,
Later swept away for a call to be answered.
But he never returned again.
He tried so hard to keep his promise
To his little girl,
But now twenty years have gone pass:
She still holds on to the wool coat.
And his jacket keeps her warm,
And his jacket dries her tears,
Just like her daddy wanted to.

She's lost
I grieve
I'm a ghost
In her shadow
I sip cold coffee
And wait impatiently
For a glimpse
Of recognition
And daydream of
Days we shared
Lattes gossiping
In companionship
Dearest mom
Our coffee is cold
This drink is bitter
I'm lost

***** and Pillaged
At a young age
A veil descended
Closing her heart to others
Yearning for love,
She understands not
That the veil must drop
For love to fill her heart

Aren't we all?

Aren't we all in the process of changing,
in the process of growing up and
becoming a new individual all the while
staying the same?

Aren't we all walking along same roads,
just different directions?

And aren't we all discovering ourselves,
in the process of knowing others?

Aren't we all?

The amount of energy
It takes me to stop
The tears
Drains the life out of me.

The amount of energy
It takes me to smile
My day away
Drains the soul out of me.

But none of this
Will ever
Drain the love out of me
Nor
The memories of you and me.