Innocent: Favorites

Feb 2016 Innocent

Pixievic

*****, gin, wine or ***
Anything will do
A girl needs something strong
Just to get her through
In this utter crap & solitude
To which I find I'm living
My friends are Henny's cider
Or any other sin
Tobacco and not eating
Are helping me lose weight
And perhaps a line of coke will do
To deaden all the hate
I really should take more care
Especially for the child
But I still can't quite remember
The last time that I smiled
To self destruct is what I know
From years of selfish pain
But I will pull through
I will be strong
I will return again

(C) Pixievic 2016

I actually wrote this last year at the beginning of my divorce - I am getting stronger - & I believe I have returned!!

#despair #divorce #selfdestruct

Feb 2016 Innocent

Every Song

Feb 2016 Innocent

Just Melz

Every Song

Every song you ever said was about me
I play on repeat
Singing along to all the words that hopefully still mean something
Titles and tracks that shuffle on a loop
Somehow constantly reminding me of you
And I can't seem to forget the words you wrote too
But what means the most
Is something only you can do
When you sing to me
And I can feel that every word is true

#love #life #you #me #song #live #sing #tracks #hellopoetry107

Feb 2016 Innocent

all my life

Feb 2016 Innocent

GaryFairy

all my life

all my life, it's been nothing but the fear
living in a world where any peace is rare
when angels and demons whisper in my ear
not having what it takes, it makes it hard to bear

all my life, I've been walking in the steps
following a path that hasn't led to better yet
i'm taking bets about what might happen next
I wonder to myself, is this as good as it ever gets?

Sorry about the emo stuff. I think I will keep adding to this poem though. Hopefully with more positivity.

#depression #life #spirituality

Feb 2016 Innocent

Guilty Pleasure

Feb 2016 Innocent

Pixievic

Guilty Pleasure

I pull you out
Smoothing your creases
Lying you flat so I can
Fill you with
A sweet mixture of guilt
And poison
There's artistry in my fingers
As I roll you expertly
From years of practice
Along your length
Into the shape I desire
I lick your edges
Firmly sealing you with a feather like touch
I place you lovingly between
My lips
Flicking the flame
That will bring you to life
I draw you deep into my mouth
Relishing the burn as you travel down
My throat
Into my lungs
Where with each puff

You

****
me

Slowly

(C) Pixievic 2016

I 'roll my own' - cigarettes! I know it's bad for me, like so many other pleasures in life

#smoking #pleasure #wordporn

Feb 2016 Innocent

Le Chein Noir

Feb 2016 Innocent

Pixievic

Le Chein Noir

The black dog came a calling
****** that he is
Stuck his nose into my life
And tried to take what wasn't his

(C) Pixievic 2016

Churchill eloquently referred to depression as 'the black dog' - I think it sounds nicer in French!!

#depression

Feb 2016 Innocent

Contemplation

Feb 2016 Innocent

Pixievic

Contemplation

I sit on a bench
On a hill
In the rain
Hiding my tears
My heart
Full of pain
I watch
I listen
I wait in vain
For the answer
To a question
I can't explain

I sit on a bench
In a park
Full of history
Surrounded by people
Who pass by
But can't see me
I am hurt
I am broken
And they let me be
A girl
On a bench
Across from the abbey

I sit on my bench
In quiet
Contemplation
A man walks by
On his face
Admiration
He smiles
He sees
The hurt and frustration
Of the girl
On the bench
Who has no conviction

He sits on my bench
On the hill
In the rain
He asks me
To share my fear
And my pain
I speak
He listens
And I smile again
On a bench
With a friend
On a hill in the rain

(C) Pixievic 2016

Wrote this awhile ago - but it popped into my head today ....!

#sadness #friend #contemplation