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I come face-to-face with my Shadow
hungry
devouring
depraved.

The lupine
before a full hunter moon
bristles.
Hot saliva
falls
from hurtful pointed rows
in pearls.

This
in Goodge Street Station's
Underground
where a poster
promotes
The Hunger
a page-turner

The Clown in Soho:

3 Chocolate Martinis
4 lagers
1 gram of *******
300 press-ups
7 mile run and
1 sachet of Kamagra

… the night begins …

I howl with delight
- that’s me -
cracks open
a smile
yellow eddies swirl
in thrawl
to that shadow beast o’ mine.

This monstrous
I
can never satiated be --
a beast to straight jacket under the influence of the waning and waxing moon
and on the night of the carmine moon
release

My phone rings
(Excuse me, while I take this).
‘Hello, am I speaking to Ashley?’
‘Depends on who’s asking,’
I respond
licking my lips.
‘You Ashley Chapman?’
I like this kind o’ game.
‘Like I said,
who’s asking?’
Frustrated he repeats, ‘Confirm your name.’
I yawn and tell him as savagely as I can:
'No!'
Wolves
know 'no'
to the pack.

But as in Beauty and the Beast
(the Cocteau 1946 version, of course)
beneath that thick molting hair pelt
beasts have culture
and feelings, too
(a lion's heart?)
and mostly
(occasionally not)
given
space
food
The Den
a willing mate (or two)
we’re okay
affectionate dogs.
For when all is well with my shadow
-- no problem
   in peace
   in chains
'til the looped moon!
Kamagra is apparently a form of ******.

Disclaimer: I have to to say that some of the things alluded to in this poem, such as ******* (or Kamarga) in no way form a part of my reality. This is a poem and reflects only a meditation on the nature of BEING, not necessarily who I actually am or how I live my life, although I acknowledge being a thirsty fool!
The notes and first draft for this poem came about a while back in 2015 when I attended a course on Shamanism at the Institute of Psychic Studies in South Kensington and was asked by my teacher to pick a card from a tarot deck to explore the Shadow side of my nature. I picked the wolf -- to my horror! And was asked to write what this meant for me. On the way home I came across the poster in the Underground and a  first draft was completed.

Thanks for reading.
thunder volleys
roll across the evening's sky
thunder volleys
drumming like the wheels of trolleys
a crescendo so loud in ply
as the grumbling noise trundles by
thunder volleys
 Oct 2017 H A Vitatoe
Mel Kay
Unkind
 Oct 2017 H A Vitatoe
Mel Kay
Under florescent light,

I realise,

It seems as though my friends were right,

You're quite unkind.
Yes. YOU.
 Oct 2017 H A Vitatoe
Lora Lee
in this
pocketful
        of limbo
          the distance rises
               in curls of smoke
        a prairie fire
siphoning into
crisp edge
           of forest
          Inside my
uncloaked ventricle
primeval forces
turn my blood into
dusted gold
as they pump
        sacred texts
into my oxygen
      They roll your quintessence
upon my fingers,
            playing inside
     my psyche's  
wild ache
a spread of orifice
in spellbound mantra,
       as I spit out
          the
            hairy thorns,
a holy purge of
   internal
        engravings
    
Somehow ---
like a miracle,
I grow ripe seedlings
from deep within
            my womb
as I trip into
a universe rising
I take wisps
of your grace
as it brushes
the jut of my
astral collarbone
You are always
         grounding me
                    like this,
               my tongue
              tripping
         over velvet
stance of warrior
        assuaged into silk
    
        Without you,
I might be
whisked off into
the periphery
of chaos
but instead
       I am simply
tied to
      the urgency
of the little novas
about to
        explode

While I wait
            I tend to
              the wildfires.
     to make sure they
                   are still burning
I keep my honey
wet and fresh
upon your
                   lips,
let my pores
drip moonpools
    into your glistening
wet of mouth
and only when
          it is time
I let the whole of
           me burst
into the
      fire -wrapped
tips of
   stars
suits the mood!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pqnMkUcTmys
An unspoken sorrow is embroidered against my chest
I'm drowning in questions and floating, unsure  of how to swim
Her winged eyelashes catch my dreams
My spirit trembling with voiceless gestures
Dandelion hair and sapphire eyes
Overcome with disease my arms spread open wide
I would live beneath your bones to take the pain away
At birth you grasped at cords to stay alive
A tiny bird blindly stripped of wings and other things
Oxygen deprived in this battlefield of life
Tempestuous pestilence of manic depressive tendencies invested in a message cocked and loaded as a centerpiece

           Unfold it, if you will,

   The beast lives in these pages
  While the people all went home to their own separate cages
Locks become phones that never ring
  No bars but still encasing, these cells are in our genes
  
Its a prison of DNA strands unlocked with a paper key*
    Held firm by *words written within
the world awaits to see
You aren't what you are born into. You can sculpt yourself to become whatever you want and achieve artistic freedom.
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