I fear that the voices in my head will get to me.
Lead me into becoming a puppet to their enchanting orders.
The heart that I trusted so much has fled.
I believe it now hides in a cabin,
Hoping that I don't find it.
It seems as if my body, soul and mind have a life of their own.
I wish I could hide the truth but the mirror never lies,
It reflects all my imperfections and how I trully feel inside.
I hate the mess I have become.
I hate what the people think I have become,
A PERFECT IMPERFECTION

it's just a t-shirt but
there's something comforting
about how it carries
the smell of your worn out sheets

1380

How much the present moment means
To those who’ve nothing more—
The Fop—the Carp—the Atheist—
Stake an entire store
Upon a Moment’s shallow Rim
While their commuted Feet
The Torrents of Eternity
Do all but inundate—

Maybe someday you'll love me.
Maybe someday my eyes will be the ones you fantasize of before you fall asleep, not his.
Maybe someday every fear shall be conquered like some great hero on his quest to vanquish this depression and keep the demons at bay.
Maybe someday the compilation of the love letters I left on your skin will linger longer than my scent on you and perhaps you'll remember these marks over him.
Maybe someday I won't love alone.
Maybe someday I can hold your gaze and not feel empty inside knowing that I've lied to you.
Maybe that's the root of all this.
That I've lied to you.
That her skin haunts me sometimes and creeps into my mind like the bump in the night and sometimes I'm not honest when I say who the 'I love you' is to.
Maybe it's because I've lied when I say it's always been you.

I don't want many ties that unwind

I don't want to feel the omnivorous shade of blue over and over again

I want to be your Save By The Bell

That doesn't stop after four seasons

Giving you a million reasons

To love life more than before

I found you perched up in my heart

Don't squander the beauty

You have a deep ingenuity

That entices me like the victim I am

So helpless yet so assertive

You're too grand and I'm unsure if I deserve it

I aspire to be one and done

To the honeymoon

To the gravestones

Be the whiteness that's in our transient bones

When the doubt creeps in

Remember I pray to God every day that you'd be mine

And that you're always feeling jolly and fine

It's for real this time

It always has been.