Time passes on by
Intimate moments fly
Counting as seconds pass
Keeping secrets such as;
In the midst of dreams
Nothing is as it seems
Gathering specks of time set

Comforting of how you met
Leaving behind a future gone
Of when the days were long
Clouds are in darkened sky
Killing hours before you die

She melds into the the soft sheets
Her milky white skin
Hot and smooth
Beneath my rough palm
A touch goodbye
That lingers like a kiss
Her words come back to me
As my caress glides over her
I taste her lips
And hot salty tears
And feel her fall into me
As she tells me the news
She is still so young and beautiful
And vibrant
That I almost can't believe it
But I have to
I can see it in her eyes
Her beautiful brown eyes
Say it all
And I just wish it was a lie
A filthy lie
Told only to hurt me
To tear the world out
from beneath my feet
To stab my heart
Until it bleeds
And cut me open
Like a knife
But it's not
For all my wishing
It's true
And now I touch her
On my way out the door
As she sleeps in soft comfort
So warm and peaceful and beautiful
And I don't want to leave

I see my light going on and going off
on and off
on and off
flickering
flickering, I see them
flickering
the light is fleeting
limited
limited the light may have been
until I decided
to be limitless

I yearn
       to be engraved
       in the deepest crevice
       of your brain

I want you
       to think of my skin
       against your skin...
                  ...of my heart beating fast
                  against your heart

I thirst for you
      to think of your pores - opening -  
      absorbing the essence of my soul

I need you
      to crave
       of every single detail
       of our moments together

Secretly,
      I long for you
      to worship
      the perfection
      you have perceived
      of me

do you know
how hard it is
to walk smiling
when all you feel is pain
sadness and tears on your face?

Keep your eyes closed, we are blind tonight
You can sit on the floorboards,
where I've bled,
naked and dark with me.

"Where are you from?

"Me?"

"Yeah. Where are you from?"

"I'm not really sure. Somewhere. Where are you from?"

"Here. Well, I was born here. I don't want to be from here, though."

"Where would you rather be from if you don't want to be from here?"

"I don't know. Anywhere but, really. Maybe Alaska."

"Why Alaska?"

"Well, I don't know. I'm not sure. Well, you see, they have a month of darkness every year. Just complete darkness. Some people think it's miserable. I think I'd like it, though. That way everyone could be just as invisible as me, even if for only a month out of the year."

Do your parents love you?
Are you religious?
Do you love everyone except yourself?
Are people nice to you?

Swim into me, swivel in the air
your eyes are penchant stares
Try all you can,
let everything and everyone caress you
Let the cold wind blow
and the warm wind undress you.

"Do you know what you did wrong?"

"What I did wrong?"

"Yeah. What you did ******* wrong."

"I-I...I'm not sure."

"You have to be ******* kidding me."

"I tried my be-"

"Shut the **** up. Shut. The. ****. Up. If you want to be something, if you want to get ahead in life, then you can't rely on me, your mother, your friends, or anyone except you. You have to know that every decision is your own, and every consequence that comes along with each decision, is your own to handle. No one will help you, and no one needs to help you because it's not their responsibility. You handle your own ****, and you do better than your best. Perfection. If you aren't perfect, then you aren't anything."

Birds and flies swivel around my head
you sit under a tree with thorns in your hair
I say, "Hi."
You say, "Hi."
I sit next to you, and you don't get up.
You smile and say, "Where have you been?"

And death shall have no dominion?
Is that so much a hope rather than opinion?
Under the windings of the sea?
And if no air breezes by, for you and me?
And if the resolution of my lack of evolution keeps me free?
Is there any hope in harmony. Is there any hope in harmony.
Is there any hope in harmony. Is there any hope in being me.

"Dreams are dangerous, Josh. They're sedatives, not cures. Choose reality. Choose the bitter pill. Because whether you believe it or not, you will end up having it whether you're forced to take it or whether you choose to take it. No matter how much talent you think you have, no matter how much stubbornness that you mistake for ambition, you will be unable to attain your dreams."

"What if you're wrong?"

"What if I'm wrong? Well, let's see-"

"No. What if you're wrong? What if you say all this because of your personal experience. What if you believe all of that because your belief in yourself was stripped by those before you? You could have done something bigger, but you gave up on yourself. You could have been someone. You could have been happy, instead of what you are now. Don't take away the only thing I have just because you have nothing."


Fear is a deadly thing to bear witness to
The hollow spot in the wall,
the eyes staring at a coffee mug,
the words, "I promise."

Tear apart an inverted heart,
and disappear into reverse midnight
All alone with a telephone,
"You're still there, right?"
Dial-tone silence followed by
fist to wall violence
and to sit alone in a bathtub
crying
is a new form of living yet
dying

I can hear violins amidst the violence
And I can see your eyes in the dark
There will be hands shaking
To you, for without, every burn
that's been allowed,
a night to relieve
your weary mind from unkind
lovers, mothers, fathers, brothers
and a hope that you retrieve
yourself in the debris


"Why do you care so much?"

"Why do I care?"

"A better question would be: Why do you care about people so much?"

"Because there's more beauty than desolation in humanity, or at least I choose to believe so."


Sunset sonata
*** in empty beds, in empty heads
Our sweat is a stranger, just like you
and just like me
*** is like society
And we're so focused on ******* each other
no matter how badly it ******* hurts us in the process

I heard your voice on the radio
Each word transmitting
from your lips
You touch me more than you even know
From my neck to your fingertips

To be under your skin
is where I should have been.
From the start I knew
a little bit of everything
except you.
And to know you
is to know everything.