You are naked.
Alone.
In this room you have been in countless times,
but is in no way comforting.
The walls are all white,
the floor, sky blue and white
checkered tile.
You look up,
the single bulb flickers for a moment,
you walk towards the tub
in the center of the room,
it is an old style tub
with the clawed toes.
You turn the faucet,
it begins to ooze
dark red.
Is it mud?
or maybe blood.
you plug up the tub,
and sit down on the edge.
You watch the ooze
slowly covering the porcelain
and you get in
you sit down.
The ooze comes just up to your knees now.
It is odly cold
staining your skin.
You shiver,
but lie back anyways
as if to relax.
The ooze creeps up over you
engulfs you
smothers out all your senses
except sight
everything is silent now
and you can no longer breathe
The ooze is all around you
sloshing over the edge of the tub
and staining the tiles
sky blue and red.

The torturous insomnia
gives way to nightmares
that chill her to the bone
and the nightmares break
leaving her empty and depressed
and she lies in the crushing darkness
sleepless and terrified.

What scares me the most?
The moment you let go.

Why did you stay
I never asked you to stay
I wish you would leave
It would be easier
My mind distorts reality
Though I'll never tell how much
But when you're here I can't
Go and get the hell out
I can't do this with you here
Leave, leave, I'm begging dear
I need to get away, as do you
You just leave me
And I'll leave you
Walk down the stairs and
Don't come back
I'll just stay here with shards of glass
Then when I turn and see
You've gone down the street
I'll slit my throat
With no one left
                              to hold on to me

bow down to me
you’re nothing without my fury
with clouds in your eyes
and smoke in your belly
don’t question my love
come to me my love
let me show why you dropped everything for me
for a couple of hours
with death in your hand
for a couple of hours
you might just understand

in the clouds
where everything is perfect
where all the stars aline
in the clouds
one more drink is worth it
just shut up and trust me
and walk across this burning bridge
it won’t hurt a bit my love
don’t be scared of my clouds

"The dead just seem to sleep so soundly..." she said.

Listen to my heart pound
though you'll never hear the sound
fighting every single day
I can never seem to get away
cover my ears
so the sound will fade
then I try
to hide in the shade
for I have no shadow
I am already dead
all because of the voices inside my head
bickering, screaming, yelling, and fighting
all these voices are so uninviting
I can't seem to tune them out
yet I know without a doubt
these voices are familiar
and as I lay in the pitch black
I can't help but want them back
so I sit here and wait
waiting for my fate
waiting for the voices my mind......
loves to create