Today I felt alone.
The kind of alone where all you
want is to talk to someone
- to make you feel whole again.

But I was never empty without them.
Just a little hollow.
A type of hollowness that everyone struggles through at some point
- no matter the mind or body.

I don't want to rely on others,
but I feel my ego is too powerful
right now to think anything else.

But let us think positive.
I do not feel sad - just slow.
Just quiet.
Just still.
Just like nature.

We are never alone when we have nature.
We just are deconstructing the concept of busyness, speed, and time.

Don't worry your mind.
This all shall pass,
but in this moment
just be still.

Women crave for a rebirth
and I am no exception.
I crave to hear a choir and feel the water rush over me,
leaving me with a sense of purpose and a new perspective.
I want to forget my name.
I want to see my life in a new light.
I feel it's time for me to leave my body and leave my past.
It's time for me to find my mind
because I know that it must get better than this.

So let me grow,
I believe that it does get better than this.
I have seen many women learn how to scream their own name,
over and over and over and over again.
Howling into the clouds and radiate like the sun,
and I start to wonder when my time will come.
However, I know I must learn to grow steady like the harvest
because I know rebirth is not a path that we can rush down

I'm a modern woman.
I give so much love and healing words to others,
but leave myself empty until I'm bird bones.
Maybe one day I'll learn to be more tender and love myself like a painting worshipped in the Louvre.
I'll treat my body the way I treat a lover.
I'll kiss myself up and down until I go numb.
I'll feed myself the sweetest peaches, plums, and cherries.
I'll finally see all my curves as rivers and valleys blooming endlessly with flowers the color of the setting sun.
I know this is journey that cannot be rushed into,
but my mind is more stubborn than I am.
So I must learn to be patient,
I must learn to be kind,
I must learn to give myself a minute.
I'll fake it every day until one morning I'll wake up and see myself as soft,
as beautiful,
as elegant,
as powerful
as the Renaissance women worshipped in museums.
I've looked like them all this time.