I try to view as just a bump in the road
Wish silently the right way to be shown
I've been walking this path for so many years
Other directions seem to disappear
I sit and wait for opportunity's knock
It doesn't
Continue to walk..
Against wall my back is pressed
Is this destiny or simply a test?
I should be alarmed
The darkness closing in
It's nothing compared to the blackness within

Soon I will start healing
At least that's what I hope
It's what I tell myself each night
To ease my grief and help me cope

What a cruel reality
The lonely ditch I've dug
No words to describe the depth of my pain
No one to listen
Nobody to hug

A terrible lie resounds in my head
"It's all your fault "
A voice declares
A barrage of negative beliefs cavort
In a twisted game of musical chairs

Broken promise of forever
Remaining shards rest in my hands
Along with the fading traces
Of our once-unified plans

Imprisoned by sweet memories
Held captive in their embrace
Try to take a step forward
But my feet are frozen in place

Never have I felt so low
Crushed by overwhelming desire
Not understanding how attraction so strong
Could suddenly with no warning expire

I yearn for happiness I had
Before blue skies turned grey
Now the closest to joy I will get
Are those moments in my mind I replay

An awful truth I must accept
Is that you are never coming back
And since you left my heart has darkened
To an ugly shade of bluish-black

I fear my tomorrows will all be the same
In this tunnel I see no light at the end
It has been a whole year since goodbye
And these wounds haven't yet begun to mend

Set my soul free from misery
And the love to which it is bound
Maybe then I will uncover peace
That so far cannot be found

Trapped in midnight
word mud madness
stuck in my head like
paint on canvas
untangling and wrestling
this vocab vine
tired, slurring sentences
like I'm drunk on wine
turn down the lights
try to get some sleep
brain won't shut off
it's in way too deep

dead fly on my roller blind
dragged into the light
there to find as I unwind
or draw back up at night

round as ripples on a pool
flattened by the wheel
spinning on the pole and spool
cured of real by reel

this had happened long before
and would repeat again
knock he might on heaven’s door
but here he will remain

like that movie, Groundhog Day
from his dream never wakes
rolling out and rolled away
reminded of mistakes

reflecting on this gruesome sight
I think of my life too
and perhaps explain it might
why I get deja-vous

someone, somewhere pulls a string
and once again I'm seen
life and death are the same thing
we're dead flies on a screen.