In a time of somberness
I have been awakened
Desires to do what I've always wanted
Learning
Growing
Enlivening
To thrive in darkness is a super power
Become a better person on the other side

Somebody once told me
you'll lose more than you'll win
It's the stumbles that bring you back to your feet, carefully
You'll cry more than you'll laugh
Tears of hurt because life is pain
Laugh it up while trying to cope
The rope in my hand ready to hang
That voice in my head, saying "not  yet"

I'm alive and breathing even though I don't want to
That voice in my head is right
"you're not worth it"
Decided I need help after a long, long time
To shut that someone up telling me all these lies about life
I will win wars
I will laugh everyday in happiness
That voice, that someone doesn't have a hold again
Taking back that control I once had when I was young

he was like
a shadow in the night
as quickly as he came
he left
met by chance
loved by choice

made me feel
like I was flying
like a bird
so calm
so free

the love I had
was the kind that should be
he told me
time and time again
I was the only one
he wanted
he dreamed of
he searched his whole life for

my intentions were real
went beyond
what I could ever imagine
I reveled in his love
that he made known

I could do no wrong
in his eyes
gained the confidence
I've longed for

then the cold night
dead in the middle of March
he left
like a mirage
he vanished
his love left with him

I could no longer feel
numb
is the right word
couldn't think
couldn't act
couldn't move

still all these months later
I miss what we had
you were gone too soon
never to hear
never to see
you again

if life were like a movie
we'd be together
the fairy tale
that all girls imagine

I would get on that flight
go to you
and make you mine
again.