We are waiting to settle the rains.
As we have waited for many
many
years.

we are standing hand in hand.
Holding on
the way people do
when high-waters reach waists

The hand I hold is familiar to my heart.

soft
and sincere
And so like mine.
But quick and without callouses.
not a scar or scratch to see.

we are standing hand in hand
always.
There is no other way.
waiting to settle the rains.

And I know that I would run him away from
any harm.
Protect him
from every curse,
knife,
and word.

But I know that I am not shelter.
I am not the house to cover his head,
or the food to replenish his belly.
I cannot give him all of the things
they are taking away.

I am not shelter.

I am a heart.

I am a trip to the beach on a blistering day,
a drop of water in this desert.
I am a moment's peace in a hurricane,
a floating branch to cling to in this flood.

I am not shelter.

I am a heart.
and he is mine.

I’m in the pool dancing and then I’m not
My mind is far and my body is static
I stand there but where?
I’m so lost but I haven’t moved

I’m at the bar talking and then I’m not
My mind is travelling and my body is marble
the words stop coming because I’m not here
But where am I?

I’m reading, devouring the chapter and then I’m Not
My eyes glitter over and my body remains

I travelled away but I don’t know where
Any empty true nothing
The world moved and progressed
The people around me walked and talked
But I stood there fixed
Thinking of nothing
Going anti clock wise in a wave of progression

I’m disassociating again. I don’t know why I don’t know where
And all I seem to do is glare
maybe into the nothingness , maybe into the past

I’m writing rhymes in my pad and then I’m not
the pen and the lines evanesce
I’d like to come back.

The sun slinks into golden hue
Melting on the horizon
It trickles through turrets and chimneys
A final reflection on a window
A moment, then
Absorbed and claimed by the silent silhouettes
Gone, an echo lingering; Twilight
Silently creeps down the space remaining
Claiming a quiet victory
Bright lights appear and twinkle
Welcoming Father Night

You’ve left me there,
In the dark-
With all of the demons of my past.
They’ve held me captive in those shadows,
And they continued to-
While you waltzed into the light.

                           Alysia Marie 2018 ©