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N May 2022
To you
who’s silence
pains me deeply

I admit,
I still converse with
you in my head

I have slowly forgotten
the sound of
your bewitching voice

But I remember how
your small mouth  
was my greatest desire
N May 2022
I have but you to love,
it is only you I dare
to want so violently

I am afraid of
my relentless
yearning for you

It sickens me
to want this much
and for so long

I have never wished for you
to turn into a memory that
only brings me great pain
N Apr 2022
I am turning blue
as the days go by,
and soon I will start to fade

But before I do,
I wish to write about all the
shades of colors I used to be

How I turned bright yellow when
I saw her face every morning,
as a sunflower turns lovingly
to worship the burning sun

Alas, I am no longer vibrant and alive
The morning sun blinds me,
and your face only brings me pain
N Mar 2022
A wilting flower
that will never
feel spring’s warmth

The harsh winter is all it ever known,
in an unloving season
is how it leaves this world
N Mar 2022
What you see is before you
is a groaning animal that has
forgotten it used to be human

With flowing words,
simply seeking the pleasures of being,
and an immense love to pour

By god,
I could have sworn that
I have felt the joy of living once

But now, I cannot bare
the agonizing sound
of my beating heart
A nod to Osamu Dazai
N Mar 2022
I have been ruining myself
for you

I still write you
after all these years knowing you
will never read my bleeding verses

I dream of you
dancing in a black dress
as I try to hold your gaze

I spray your perfume,
and the ghosts of my mind wail
from the rushing memories

I still exist,
but not with you
N Feb 2022
It hurts
to love you
like this

Without you knowing
how I ache for you

Please, stay,
and listen to a heart that
recites your name like a poem
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