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I don't want to live,
But I don't want to die.
 Oct 2020 Brian Payamps
As we sat in the car and the sun declined, the world turned to a peach hue and dimmed. The pouring rain from not only an hour before still felt as if it lingered in the air, sticking to my skin. A car joined us in the parking lot and started staring to the East, we both turned our gaze to align with theirs and saw a perfect rainbow accompanied by a faded second. And as we sat there and reflected on the topic of the human perseption of light, I found a moment to ask, "Can I kiss you so we can remember this moment forever?"
They replied, "of course".
Romantic or cheesy? I see no difference
 Oct 2020 Brian Payamps
Our soft universe
had never known perfection
until it first rained
Lightning struck nearby, it blinded my eyes, and rang my ears like a bell.
I have never been so in love.
 Oct 2020 Brian Payamps
breaking my rules
and making a four word song
when usually i take my brain
and mash it into one place

don't wake me up from my dreams
where it's a place where i didn't ruin us
a place where you still think i'm normal
and a place where you believe in me
and maybe you'd want me there too??

don't wake me up from my guileless guilt
the place i know so well
still warm from a daydreaming sleep
forming around my body, pressed into shape
a place where i can think about the way
you pushed me away

wake me up when it's bright blue outside
cold and biting, clouds filled with mirth at my pride
at the things i've done and the places i've gone
woah. what do i do anymore

it's damaged, really, the way that i see
a person in front of me, eyes flashing like
broken highway signs littering the road
but is that flashing a good thing?
i take it that the answer is no
the big brother hm
Into the woods we ran.
Our bodies and souls entwined,
A ravenous ivy…
Consuming everything we could see,
Claiming it our own.

Until we stumbled upon a large oak tree,
In the middle of the wood.
There I stopped,
Pulling you closer…
I showed you every cut, every cracked branch, every hole…
You held my hand close to your chest,
As we covered every blemish…

From then on every moment,
Bursting with life.
The sun rose a heat,
Dwarfed only by my passion for you.
The breeze blew,
A caress, familiar… comforting…
An exhale, a thousand butterflies…
The same butterflies you breathed into me,
Our first kiss.

But, our forest fell under fire…
The spark from a new smile…
As the wood set a blaze,
Our ivy fade to ash.
The butterflies left to chase a new desire.

There sits that lone oak tree
Cuts, cracks, holes…
But this time, it’s burning to it’s very last fiber.
Now tell me, when a heart falls…
And not a soul is around,
Does it make a sound when it breaks?
This poem has a bit of symbolism within it that isn't very clear until the final lines... I hope you enjoy!
closed her
eyes and took
a very deep breath,
crossed her fingers then
w  h     i     s    p   e    r     e   d,
"I long to see the   o n l  y
man who made me
shine in his
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