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Talk about what?
At the end of such times
Like the world’s almost over
Awaiting to die
Always me
What I say
To the other’s dismay
Then alone, contemplate
What was left to convey
Put it all on the table
Unstable
And shaking
So scared I would hurt you
And lust in the taking
Of hearts again
Never mend
Once in the breaking
Of winters,
And razors,
To roses in bloom
Spilling deep in its dissonance
Lighten the mood
Wanted to
Be renewing you
There when you fell
When you laughed,
When you cried,
When you reveled in hell
I would dwell in your spelling
And check every line
For a rhyme out of place
In your orderly mind
With its elegant, urbane,
Eclectic design
Like an image instilled
In a frozen tomorrow,
A bundle of sticks
And elixirs of sorrow
A twist in the system,
A matrix glitch dude
And you knew that I was
Always in such a mood
I thought I saw you in the park today
Walking with her
Talking with her
Laying in the grass in the shade of the tall trees
I wondered if you ever read what I wrote about you
If you remember the words as clearly as I
If you can hear the crunches of leaves I described
Or did you forget it all?
Would seeing me bring the words back?
Dreams are a powerful thing, it’s how my mom met my dad a week before they met in real life, it’s how I lost a friend, and it’s how our minds keep churning out these bitter thoughts
Lie to me.
Tell me that I am everything I never was.
Tell me that I am beautiful and watch me tremble and shake.
Look into my eyes and lie to my face, will you?

Why did I build my home on such
an unsteady foundation
of lies and insecurity?
Time and time again,
I swallow my grief
just to blink back tears and brush the truth away.
Stay where you are and do not come near.
Don't cause a land slide that will surely destroy me.
I will be crushed under the weight of so many lies
weakly supported by kind intentions.

Hide the truth for me if you love me truly.
Cover my eyes and whisper into my ears: you are beautiful.
Protect me with your lies.
  Mar 2021 Just Another Flower
tree
i'm not afraid of dying
i'm lying when i say
i don't want to die
after all, but
life is just a cycle
they say
we are born to die

really, i am afraid
of existence
i look forward to the end
i'd never say
death scares me
now read it from the bottom up :)
i want things to be clear
i want them to be black or white
but to my dismay
all things are gray
I want all things to be clear
I want them to be black or white
but to my dismay
all things are grey
I need a light to guide me, to show me the way
So nothing can pull me astray
Sometimes I don’t know where I am
Stuck in this thick grey jam
Then the light appears
And all the grey clears
The same thing happens again and again
I’m led astray
Then shown the way
It’s like my life is on replay
~17/3/21
Someone, please show me the way...
Her feet as light as a feather
At her own pace, moving at her leisure
Her toes making ripples in the water
Gliding over the substance as slow as a saunter
She stares at her reflection as it ripples away
She plunges her hand in and the water will obey
Water trickles through the cracks her cupped hand
Everything about it she can understand
Her only friend, companion, that listens to her every demand
Smiling to herself, she feels grand
~17/3/21
Sometimes I like to imagine I have superpowers, but it's all just a fantasy.
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