I sit on the bed by the window
Naming the falling leaves.
You sit between the scribbled paper walls
Counting the ever-opened scars.
While the coffee grows colder,
I think of you,
Seven hundred and seventy seven
Kilometers away.
While the bottle falls empty?
You hit the floor with it,
About a thousand
Worlds away.

I hold my hand out in the void
In case yours reaches.
You hold still on the damp floor.
Empty bottles are old friends..

I whisper like madmen, words
I don't understand.
You silently hold your breath, while
Inside storms are raging.
Fracturing physical form,
Savagely splintering spirits,
Shattering shimmering souls
In the incessant night, ****** red hue
Flowing
From Little girl Blue.

Of everything I never had
I only dreamt of you
A wind to push me on in life
Fresh air
Just a breath, to carry me through

Of all the wants I've ever had
The only need was you
Come sun, come rain
Come joy or pain
There were open arms to always run to

I kept you in that bubbled hope
That sphere of glass and air
For everything that blew away
One dream stayed anchored there

Thank you for being just enough
To keep me feeling real
For being that one and truest love
When I was sure I wouldn't heal

You were just enough for quite some time
Until I gave you my soul
Then the glass  orb imploded
And my insides exploded
And I'd finished with digging my hole

your love letters used to make me feel
love
and then hate
but now
they are just words on paper
and all they make me feel is
free.

Wipe away the history
     Of tomorrow!
Heavy lead lids
Covering
Coffee stained eyes
In the darkness
The yesterdays are
Revealed scintillating
Sprouting regret
Remorse digs deeper
With steel roots
Eating its way
In this chipped heart.
The flesh is stubborn
Bearing the scars
And the scabs
Of feelings no longer
Comprehended.

     **Undo the marching
     Of uncaring time!
Dead earthen soul
Descending
To new dimensions of
Uncharted abyss
Memories splinter
Fragmenting, dispersing
Millions of pieces
Of faces forgotten
Littering non-existence.
Gone is the season of life
Flashes of
Could haves
Or should haves
Or would haves
Scattered in lofty
Nothingness.

     *Set the unforgettable faces
     On fire
     The unfinished house,
     Burn that too down to ashes
     The fire is to devour
     Even the final hour.
     Bring on the fire
     To torch the desire
     Bring on the flames
     To set it all ablaze!

you got angry
when you were hungry
you used to be sad
when our paths did not intersect
we were annoyed
at the same girl in philosophy class
you were happy
when we got to watch movies together
we were happy
sharing secrets and fundamental truths

but that's the thing.
we were happy.

I'm a humble piece of bread
Searching for your toasty arms.
When I find you, as I wait
Keep me safe, happy and warm.
Don't burn me to a thin crisp
Don't neglect me to be cold
Savour the balance of the two
As I love you till we're old.
I'll return the favour all day
As you transform to a slice
And I become your oven
In our own quaint paradise.