Visions I see
I can't sleep
Eyes wide open
In the dark
Laying watching
Trying to sleep
Listen to nothing
But my heart beat
The day ahead is planned for
People I might meet there are words for
Mistakes that may be made are dealt with
In the corners of my mind
Twisting turning
Trying to get comfortable
I'm to hot, now I'm cold
When will this end
I decided to stay awake
Discovering I can determine how my day goes
It occurs to me my attitude needed adjusting
In order to have a fruitful day
So as I laid there in the dark
I rehearsed what I might say
I practiced smiling
Instead of frowning
Laughing instead of doubting
Just being agreeable
Even if I didn't want to
Mornings here
Dressing for the day
Made my way out
Can't wait to try it out
Good morning!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I said with a smile
As I preceded to get into my car
No one was there I was just practicing
I wore myself out practicing
When it was time to do it
I failed and said ***** it

I fell in love with the goddess of self-hatred

She kissed me with lips of cold razors

as I went under her spell,

unaware of how I fell



I fought against my friends

and turned cold against past lovers,

unable to make amends,

as my eyes turned to stone,

she took hold within

The more success I get the greater my life get. The more people start to hate, the more love I give the more people don't want to take it, the more I start learning my mistakes and fixing them the more people start to judge so what should we do? I guess do nothing or do something but if I do or don't people still judge me for the right and the wrong.

I tend to shy away from makeup
I rarely pick up spray or brush
My heart is in flesh beating
and will one day turn to dust

I don't want to put forth creme facade
so you grimace when it rains
the trails of salt from filmy tears
are all that streak my face

If foreign objects draw you
jeweled tones upon the eyes
I do not fault your fancy tastes
or call concealer lies

But love is not burst into fire
by the curving of a kohl stick
And cheeks that redden with a kiss
are all that I would wish
to feed the flame upon the wick
that brightens and brings higher
two souls too bright to miss