I'm sorry I ever convinced you that I'm feeling happy

Night comes in, protection strips thin.
Frail fingers held the cages closed.
And with just a slip, the monsters come out.
And, they aren’t me.

Just keep it in.
Keep them slit in.
And i sit, thin.

I heard that there are seasons
To laugh and to cry
I struggle with the season
When You lived and You died
It's hard to play this game
Because the rules, they don't seem fair
If You care, God if You're still there

[Verse 2]
Bombs falling in Syria
A child dying of AIDS
Fighting 'round the world
A daddy lost his girl
Still we kneeled and prayed
But Heaven can feel silent
And the floor beneath gets cold
When your soul refuses to let go

[Pre-Chorus]
But wait, tell me am I too late?

[Chorus]
What happens when the healing never comes?
Do we stand and curse the heavens
Or lift our hands and feel the sun
The mystery's not clear
Just once, Your voice I'd love to hear
What happens when the healing never comes?

[Verse 3]
I know we love the seasons
Like summer and the spring
But I've been stuck in winter
Since the fall of misery
One day I'm full of anger
And the next I'm full of fear
Every year, there's a new supply of tears

[Pre-Chorus]
But wait, tell me am I too late?

[Bridge]
Is there a chance for me to believe
We would dance together soon
If there's a billion galaxies
I'll count each one 'til I'm with You
They say where You are is better
But I want You here with me
Oh, this is for a purpose
But hurt won't let me see

[Verse 4]
So now I must be silent
Your voice is in the wind
The hands that made the heavens
Will heal the storm within
I have so many questions
I don't know where to begin
Since You were there at the beginning
You already know the end

[Chorus 2]
Ooh, what happens when the healing never comes
Do we stand and curse the heavens
Or lift our hands and feel the sun
The mystery's not clear
Just once, Your voice I'd love to hear
What happens when the healing
What happens when the healing
What happens when the healing never comes

[Verse 1]
Teach me how to love You
Show me how to trust You
More than with my words or with a song
No, it's not been easy
To live life down on my knees
But with faith I know I'll carry on

[Chorus 1]
There is more to see than with my eyes
But fear sometimes can leave me paralyzed
I realize that I'm not in control
Yet it is well with my soul

[Verse 2]
The enemy's against me
Arrows all around me
Never knew the fight would last so long
In seasons of depression
I plead for Your protection
Make me right, I'm tired of being wrong[Chorus 2]
Every time there's hope, it seems to die
And the voices all around me feed that lie
Everything I see tells me to let go
Yet it is well with my soul

[Refrain]
It is well (It is well)
With my soul (With my soul)
It is well, it is well with my soul
It is well (It is well)
With my soul (With my soul)
It is well, it is well with my soul

[Tag]
Soul, my soul, woooh, my soul
With my soul, my soul, woooh, it is well with my soul
With my soul, my soul, woooh, my soul, woooh

[Chorus 3]
This fight I'm in is not of flesh and blood
The weapons that I need are in Your love
Lord, don't You ever let me go
You make it well with my soul

[Refrain]
It is well (It is well)
With my soul (With my soul)
It is well, it is well with...

[Outro]
Soul, my soul, woooh, my soul

it sometimes feels better to stay sad.
to stay in pain, pinned to the world, to have lost all you had.
to stay in the pit because it is hard.
because hurt and pain shattered and twisted your heart.
it feels warmer.
because it made you love the cold.
your joy grows old.

but.
being happy is better.
when the cold is gone.
and fear and hurt and pain lose its horns.
it's horns of exultation.
when divine love doesn't seem so far.
it never did, and never has been.
its when your heart becomes whole and the holes close up, and plans of the wicked on folds up.
when numbers no longer matter.

Jesus loves you.