she could feel each and every cell in her body
and as she thought about her existence,
about how difficult life had been,
about all the pleasant moments,
and the less pleasant,
she began to wonder about him.

he was someone who could have lead a
short time in her life, someone who
phased in and out of contact through
each month and maybe one day they
would hang out and catch up over
coffee, living life in an adultier way
because she would have had to move
out nonetheless.

he could have meant nothing more than
a best friend from one time and nothing
more than a friend in another time, but
instead he meant the world to her and
she fought for him with everything in
her being and she couldn't understand
how he meant to so much to her.

was it normal to put your dreams on
pause so that you can be with someone
who may or may not stick around?
it terrified her, but she loved him
with every cell in her body.

I lost myself in you
and that's okay

when does the rain
become the ocean?
or the bread become
the ****?

it's all semantics isn't it really
isn't "myself" just my minds interpretation
of its known realities
balanced against my own fantasies
and furthermore if myself does not exist
then it wouldn't be able to be lost

clever

A mind is a beautiful thing
and it's great at convincing itself of things
it knows to be untrue
I lost myself in you
of that much I am sure

How did I lose grip?
when did I let myself get comfortable
why did I
it always ends the same way
in as much in that it ends
but you were supposed to be different
and even though I knew that to be untrue
my mind convinced itself of that

and that's okay