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amabel Feb 2016
Time flies by.
What happened to my mom's lullaby?

What will happen next?
This is just a jumble of text,

about the future that is to come,
when I will worry about my income.

Money gets us everything these days,
the amount dependent on these essays,

that we write in school.
They mold and shape us a certain way into a little tool.

I just want to live a happy life.
Maybe even become a happy wife.

I'm trying to rhyme,
but I'm running out of time.

So here I will stop.
Stop thinking and just stare at my desktop.
I've been really thinking about the future. About college, a career, a significant other, and settling down somewhere. It's stressful to know that your job, how you get money to live, depends on how well you do in school now.

Just what's on my mind right now.
amabel Feb 2016
One crumpled paper after another
into the trash can.
I can't seem to get these thoughts
out onto paper.
amabel Dec 2015
My friends wonder why
I'm acting so care free,
so giddy.
They haven't put the pieces
together yet.
Like a picture that hasn't developed,
the result a secret.

You're my secret.

You're always in my mind,
constantly.
I can only focus on you,
and nothing else.
Like how cameras focus on one object
and blur everything else.

All our time together,
is stored in my mind forever.
Like the pictures I have of us,
tucked safely away in the shoebox
in my closet.
amabel Dec 2015
That mask you wear,
I know you wear it.
I've seen you without it,
you look beautiful without it.

So, please, take off the mask,
there is no need for it.
You, just you, is all I need to
love you.
amabel Oct 2015
Loving you is
like
enjoying the smell of sharpie
even though it's bad for you
like
touching something
that says do not touch
like
getting in trouble
then doing it again
like
getting wasted even though
you know the hangover will be horrible
Loving you
is just asking for trouble
but I do it anyways.
Trying out some new format. I like it.
amabel Oct 2015
A friend is someone
who is always there for you.
A friend is someone
who always on your side.

Right?

So why are my friends talking behind
my back?
So why do my friends despise everything
that comes out of my mouth?
So why are my friends slowly
withdrawing?

I'm not oblivious to it.
I get it.
You're tired of me now, you'll
move on.
Just like every other friend I've had.
And when you need me
again, this cycle will
start over.
Anyone else with this problem?
amabel Oct 2015
Who am I kidding?
I'm just a socially awkward person
I'm average
In that giant group that's just there to fill up the world
Never destined to do something worthy of attention
Not popular, not a total loser
I'm the extra in the movie
I'm the character in a book that doesn't even have a name

I am motivated by this
Motivated by the fear of being average
I have to prove them wrong
Every single one who said
I couldn't
I can't
I would never

I can't rest until I'm out of that giant group
That mediocre crowd

I will be the best
I have to be the best
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