True love could be,
just a brilliant,
& rare,
beautiful mistake,
setting my heart,
setting it all aquake,
& it's nothing that I can fake,
with so much that I've got at stake,

So please be gentle,
cuz' that thing can really break,
so take a chance,
cuz' life's a dance,
& one I am so willing to take,

In every single moment ,
that I am awake,
in a feeling I just can't shake,
waiting,
in a deep & endless ache,
baby this thing,
it ain't gotta a brake,
& for everybody else's sake,

One day,

I'm just hoping,
just hoping,
that it's just one,
that I,
can finally,
make.

Cherie Nolan © 2016

I  am knocking on  doors,
open  them and hear me
shout across the U.S.A. :

I may be black as blindness
or rainbow hue,
but I am as
American,

as you.

In order to heal from death
my child,
you must mourn,
and to do so properly,
in order to deal with the pain,
you must plunge a knife,
relieving the deepest ache of loss,
death is not in vain,

Cutting the **** deeper into your chest,

As I'm still breathing,
wise one,
I say alright,

Looking down at my lungs,
taking in some necessary air,
letting go of all my useless despair,

I'm amazed to still be alive,
& hoping to just simply survive,
with such life threatening wounds,

I take one last deep breath,

I remove the beating heart,
look at it pulsing in my palm,
dripping in cardinal red blood,
staining my skin,

I pull away a hand,
& I examine the sticky fingertips,
smear it on my face,
it's my war paint
mixed in with white clay,
right along with your ashes,

I am prepared to go into battle,

I am a warrior,
I would remove my fingertips
for such an important death,
as I make distinctive markings,
on your body,
so that I can find you again,
and lie with you,
your most,
beloved,

I prepare
many,
special,
& important things,
to take with you on the long journey,

You will reach the end,
at the long fork in the Milky Way,
3 days to get there,

And as you lie out in the sweet grass hills,
to talk to the children,
or become a medicine rock,
to heal the deeply wounded,

While I sing an endless mournful song,
& cut off my beautiful hair,
bleed again,
as I cut my thighs,
with a sharp rock,

I am stomping the prairie grass flat,
dancing in circles,
to the pounding drums,
yipping into the night,

I am chasing the dead,

I attach a rope to my wounds,
swing from them,
embracing the pain,
visions given
in the implications,
as music is drumming,

I close my eyes to see the flames
shaking my hands to the dancing licks,
my feet keep moving
find the beat,
the rhythm of life,

Extract the broken parts of my mind,
as some of your essence sinks,
back into your beautiful bones,

As I travel to the edge of loneliness,
as I try to find the end of it,

All souls eventually travel East,
to this paradise,

A lonely spirit tells me,
get on your knees
ask into the deep
wail into the pain,
lean in,
feel it,
retrieve it,
begin to even believe it,

Then pound an angry drum,
dear child
relieve it,

You must,
rail against time,
as you trust,
as you fly into the night sky,
in a blinded rage
write it all down
then gently turn again,
a page,
it's alright to cry,
& no,
this is not goodbye
just break down,
get hysterical,
scream at the night,
let it out child,
howl at that moon,
ask again & again of why,
run through the house,
with no where to go,
go crazy,

& then,
once your heart is healed,
you just come back.

Cherie Nolan © 2016

I pray you won't like your first sip of alcohol,
That it burns your throat and swells your eyes.
I pray it makes you gag and that you hate it
Because maybe if it's painful,
You won't use it to ease pain.
Maybe if it makes you cringe,
You won't use it to numb your mind.

I pray you won't develop a relationship with tequila,
That's stronger than your bonds with friends.
I pray you'll stop drinking when your head buzzes,
That you won't let your guard down
Because maybe you won't go home with random men
Who will do nothing for you
Except pour drinks down your throat.

I pray men don't take advantage of you,
That you won't black out on Monday nights
And wake up in strangers' beds.
I pray you won't shrug it off like it's nothing,
Because it's not.
I pray you won't fill voids with liquor
Because maybe then you'll start to feel complete.

Her cool blue eyes
freeze me in my tracks
blood runs to my feet
I slip through the cracks

I can not speak
or say her name
a willing victim
in her game

She looks at me
like I'm not there
walks right by me
like she doesn't care

I need to love her
from near or far
I whisper her name
while I drive my car

She's always with me
we'll never be apart
cause I'll always carry her
in my broken heart