Loving
Can be misleading
It could either give you paradise
Or leave you to suffer

Time
Is worth more than a dime
It could put distance between people
Or brings them closer all together

Silence
Feels nothing but absence
It could heal your soul
Or destroys you forever

Choices
Will always leave traces
You're one step closer to a better life
Or a step back closer to the knife

I spoke to God tonight
Cause the only one that knows how I feel
Is the one who took away my moonlight

Who else to talk to at 3am
Everyone is busy sleeping
I really wish these feelings could scram

I keep losing sleep
“What was my mistake”is all I could think of
Didn’t realise losing you would cut this deep

Oh why would I risk that uncertainty
I opened myself to you so easily
I took that leap so carelessly

I’ve learned my lesson
Heartless is what I should be
Maybe that could help me get over this mess I’m in

I wake up each morning wondering if the life I’m living is one worth it.
I wonder if the choices I make today are the decisions that happiness will bring me tomorrow.
And I dread that one day I will say I regret.
How can you live in the moment, in the now, if you are always trying to plan for peace?
How can you be content when there is so much more to do?
I wonder when my time will run out.
I ponder If my depression adds value to the important moments.
Is my depression not a handicap but fuel for the jet taking me to a life worth living?
To a life full and empty and calculated and spontaneous and happy and sad and full of regret or hazardously without?

There is too much regret
In unspoken words
The quiet thoughts
Whispered only to the moon

There is too much longing
In wishful thinking
Daydreams
Can quickly become a nightmare

There are too many tears
Spilled onto pillows
Over suffering and longing
From words unsaid