“I love you, unconditionally.”

But yet you hurt me with words and actions.

“I love you, unconditionally.”

You use me for yourself and treat me like an object.

“I love you, unconditionally.”

Your jokes, though you think they are nothing, dig deeper every time.

“I love you, unconditionally.”

Your hands don’t feel like love anymore.

“I love you, unconditionally.”

Your eyes aren’t filled with happiness anymore.

“I love you, unconditionally.”

When do I draw the line?

“I love you, unconditionally.”

How long do I let my unconditional love hurt, deceive, and break me?

“Do you love me...unconditionally?”

And to my new love?

“I love you, conditionally.”

i should have read the contract
before dating you
before loving you
before you
if i had read your terms and conditions
          -*** whenever i need it, your feelings aside
         - put up with my delicate ego, but allow me to slowly shatter
                    every ounce of your self-worth
          -you must not say or do anything more intelligent than I or
                    you have given grounds to publicly humiliate you
          -do not touch my fragile masculinity
          -i am permitted to treat you as inferior to myself

if i had read the fine print
then maybe i wouldn’t have signed four years of my life away

I want to learn every detail
That I plan to fall in love with.
I want to understand every imperfection,
So I can love those parts even more,
          to teach you why those are your greatest perfections.
I crave your story,
So I can add my own notes in the margins,
          to remind you where you came from and to show you
          how incredibly far you've come.
I want to savor every piece
Of everything that you are.

Your skin, sweet on my lips
Turned sour through overuse,
Through the absence of anticipation,
          of genuine adoration.
Your words cut deep
And the sincerity in your voice
          is the salt in my wounds.
The empty gestures,
Seasoned throughout the days
Only to prolong the serving of a dish
That was already cold
          and half gone.

i loved you
          i maybe even still do
some piece of me waiting
hoping it was all a bad dream
hoping that you’ll still text me goodnight
but why?
why am i still holding onto something
          that was so bad for my soul?
you were cruel (but hugged me gently)
you were abusive (but kissed me softly)
you were manipulative (but whispered “i love you”)
why were you so intoxicating?
how did i become so addicted
          to the kindness of your touch?
where did the kindness go?
i loved you
i love you
i still love you
i just want to know why?

There is something about you-your soul, it glows.
What's inside is magic, I believe it so.