Everything is falling apart
But the only thing that keeps me together
Is knowing that your doing okay

You sound healthy
Strong, like you are okay

You see me smile so brightly,
I'm hurt

You smell exactly the same as before I left: cinnamon and tears

I wonder if you taste the same, warm as a hug
As I go to reach out for you,
You feel nothing, and I feel cold

I woke up this morning and I was sad.
I’m not asking you to fix that,
I’m just asking that you love me until I’m happy again.
Then stay and love me until I’m sad again.
Over.
And over.
And over again.

i made love to the idea of leaving my footprint on the world
without looking into the idea of my foot getting caught in quick sand
getting lost in dance for a while
but i could never dance the urges off of me
unsee the things i had to see
the insecurities spewed out into my toilet
it took me a while to realize bulimia is almost always metaphorical
and for a while it became a necessity

i forgot how to fix these things inside of me
my rather apathetic way of getting threw things
and after a while
my father's anger
got the best of me
there's this numbness in my chest
i can no longer think
i can't think knowing the secrets of my family
i can't think putting all their mistakes on me
i can't think knowing my parents rejected my hurting
and i can't eat
i can't eat with all these pains building up
inside me

i made love to the idea of leaving my footprint on the world
but i left a footprint on my soul instead
right now i'm barely beautiful
my urges leave me dead

I am alone
You let me or should I say us go
Lack of communication
Our problem
But you can never say I didn't love
You
Made me worry
That I wasn't good enough

"Say  you'll  remember  me
Standing  in  a ­ nice  dress,  staring  at  the  sunset  babe
Red­  lips  and  rosy  cheeks
Say  you'll  see  me  ­again  even  if  it's  just  in  your  wildest  dreams"

I am alone
Tho our memories feel like forever
I will continue smiling
At least I know to let go
I'm not holding on to something broken
Now..
When we pass each other in the hallway..
I wish you the best

why?