Loser

Loser Apr 2019

I’m afraid to leave my bed this morning.
I don’t want to go to war.
The thought of these stranger filled hallways makes my stomach ache in fear.
And the strangers I know most give such caring glances, but I can’t help thinking that they loathe my presence.

I don’t like to lie.
But smiling does get me through the day.

school scares me

#school #fear #lie #smile #sad #war #monday #friday

Loser Apr 2019

sorry

You have officially confirmed it.
I am a monster.
Now its not only what I see,
But its what you see too.

#sorry #monster #you #hate #sad

Loser Apr 2019

I think of you during storms.

My stomach decides to light itself on fire in your presence as I wait to find comfort in a hug that I needed 10 minutes before.
I think people misunderstand just how introverted I actually am, how the spark of a laugh sends me to a corner in my room and leaves me screaming for a hand to hold.
You know, a glance from you followed by a gentle touch puts all of my evils to rest. It keeps me safe from myself. You keep me safe from myself.
And it's nights like these, with the thunder and the gloom, that make me wonder if I will ever stop needing your smile to make it through the night.
I could do it before.
So why do I need you now?

Maybe I never knew just how much I needed you.

#thunder #storm #smile #alone #happy #sad #night #fear #dark

Loser Apr 2019

*Click

Whoa.
Did that just happen?
Wait is it still happening?
Oh ****, I better calm down so I can remember this later.

This is lovely.

I couldn't describe it in a way that fit so I wrote my thought process.

#happy #smile #lovely #joy #click

Loser Apr 2019

Uh Oh

I never know if you want me or not.

idk