I don’t mean to love you
It just is this way

*And I’ve tried everything to let go
But you always stay

a 7 day
is the only day
I can get into heaven

46 times a year
(not including the whole of july)
I'm allowed to try

7, 17, 27

lucky numbers

I didn't think I'd make it through 2017
a year of free passes
to let the angels walk me down the aisle
and marry me to the sky

on a 7 day
they- the angels-
will calm my trembling and convulsing body
clean up all of my *****
take out the part of my brain that makes me feel bad
grab hold of my bleeding wrists and bandage them with feathers and love

they hold my hands
lifting me up by the grace of god herself
and 700 eyes emerge
out of every wound and pore in my skin

and I become
my own angel
my own god

I will become
my own holy number 7

In the dusty fields
at the foot
of The Grand Tetons,
A small colt wanders
in the vast grey-green lather
of sage brush.
Blotted brown patches
across its belly
like
black mold on the ceiling
Of my memories.
One can never be sure where
the clouds end
and the mountains begin.
Those looming chalky blues,
Not unlike the sea.
It is only a matter of time
before the colt finds
what it is he was looking for.
It is only a matter of time
before blue meets blue meets
green
meets sea
meets sky.
One day these mountains will
No longer remember my name.

The freedom to choose,
for good or for ill,
the happiness of the world,
or the destruction of its ilk.

The very choices we make,
shape the essence of our mind.
Who we eventually become,
is what we come to define:
As our identity and purpose,
our goals and will,
the energy to strive for,
What we deem to be real.

We all seek happiness,
and avoid the rest.
Undermining the cause,
of our happiness at best.

At worst it collapses,
our goals and its means.
It denies us the happiness,
which we all seek.

So what we choose to express,
should be all that we can.
Yet we must always be mindful,
of exactly when.

For there are those who judge,
and others who whisper,
People who stab you,
without hearing you whimper.

However hard this path may be,
undeniably, it brings true peace.
Expressing yourself as full as can be,
eventually you find, a purpose to live.

Be it a true friend,
or a partner for life.
Being simply true,
will lead others to find,
that happiness and sadness are but one thing.
And that true peace always lies, underneath this.

he might tell you
draping over
your insecurities
his love is a gift
you don’t deserve
be grateful
.
he will own you
because owning
something
is better than
nothing
he’ll put pennies
in your pockets
to remind you
that you’re worthless
.
your arms only matter
when they’re wrapped
around his waist
at least they look
slimmer that way
.
you are his coatrack
where he’ll hang his
disappointment
don’t snap
when he gets
too heavy
don’t breath
when he needs
your air
don’t exist
when he wants
some space
.
live
in the confines
of when it is
convenient
.
don’t
unless he asks you to
.

He tried to play a girl who knows a thing or two
But his game was hella wack
A miserable rookie trying to play in the big leagues
Looking a lot like Colin Kaepernick
Switching girls the way you switch up gears
Bad timing, stalling from 1 to 2
You're messy and all over the road, boy
You wanna be a player? Well here, let me show you -

Grey and sodden clouds cry
From my north-western sky
Where I used to fly with satellites
Before I was stuck at traffic lights

I'm pretending that I'm sane
With a bandage around my brain
Pretending that I'm whole
With sutures in my soul

Tight and screaming reins
Hold the prophets in my veins
Aquarius turns again
Again and yet again

                                  By Phil Roberts