We are taught from a young age that we should spend our time biting our tongue because speaking out is not attractive. We can stand up for ourselves but only if it is in such a small whisper you can barely hear it over the exasperated male species fighting over who is the strongest. We are not allowed to have certain jobs because they were made for men but I didn't know that an untouchable job was created only to dictate who can join and who can not. They told us from the minute we could walk that our brothers would be more successful than us and it didn't matter how hard we tried because they would always be one step ahead, one step closer to victory, while we.. would be one step further away each time they got closer. At school and self defense classes they teach how to not get ***** but I've never seen a class or a lesson plan that says "Don't ****". Why is it that my clothes or how much I drank dictates whether or not it's my fault that a boy could not control himself?  We can not walk down the streets of a busy town without hearing the echos of a whistle and a cat call left and right. From the age that we grow ******* and out bodies develop we are victims of being under the eyes of a man who stares at us like we are last night's meat that he wants to devour.

all in all, i loved the fall
forgot to stop
afraid to stall
walls i made to guard my heart
broken now - both torn apart
delayed disdain i fail to start
vertigo reversed to show
i'm alive but only ghosts
remain - insane, i keep them close

When the weight of
a thousand moments
wasted overthinking
makes its home on my skin
and drip, drip, drips
down my cheeks,
I doubt everything.
I doubt ability,
your credibility.
I doubt capacity,
I doubt significance.
I question why
everything I touch
eventually shatters,
and why in my heart,
you still matter.
But maybe it's time
to stop doubting myself,
cause maybe this time,
I could feel good enough.