Forgive me of my skepticism
As I find it hard to believe
That someone will actually
Love me
For me
There is no sadness within that thought
Occasionally, I've found myself at ease
Thinking that I'll only have to talk to me

If only it was that easy
If only the red string of fate
Was a reality
If only I knew someone out there
Loved me
In certainty
But, rather
I get a strange sort of freedom
In which it's half up to me
And for someone
Who's not good at decision making
It's a rather difficult thing

Mom
Why are you hiding?
I cant help you anymore
Don't you know?
All the bad memories I have with you
And you don't remember do you?
That night in my room
You had taken too many, hadn't you?
You said all those things
And yet I have to forgive you
Because I understand now
That wasn't really you

The motion of the never ending cold waters makes me sick, sometimes
It bobs up and down and by now it’s hard to tell when I’m breathing and when I’m not
The weight of the deep waters presses on my chest when my head’s above water
The air stings my throat and eyes and the remnants of the water surrounding me reside in my lungs
It’s so much easier to let go
To let the ever present waves consume me as I sink down further
To swim in shadows below and drown unassumingly
To me and everyone around me

A word alone can not describe
The awful pain one carries
Once the flower in their life
Has damaged it's pedals
I see us as a garden
The tornado that protects us
Is also the one who destroys us
There is no level high enough
Of the remorse I feel
A sadness so pure
I am almost grateful for such
An authentic emotion in a lost world
You are a greatness in this world
Whom should be showered
From the heavens with praise and love
May the waters of the ocean
Cleanse the dark caves we've walked
May the bright blue sky
Kiss you in the night
I am here with you, all day and forever
With love,
Sebastian

Heavy rain
Caught my attention
People scattered here and there
Open the window with no care
Few drops Touching my eyes
Soft and mild
Other drops slithered on my palm
Trying to see
A message from the sky?
Looking at the drops
I felt the need to cry
Why?
The rain's drops
Shaped the first
Letter of your name
My love for you
Is still the same
Love the rain
Soothing my inner pain.

Perhaps you introduced me to your mind.
Perhaps you came into my life,
perhaps we became friends
and I loved it.
          
perhaps you listened.
perhaps I still see your smile.
perhaps I dreamt about you
and it was awesome.

perhaps we touched
and your touch left me some happiness.
perhaps we hugged
and your hug made me relieve.
                          
perhaps you sung for me
in your cheesy voice.
perhaps you made my nights and days
and It felt great.

perhaps I learnt when to say sorry
perhaps you are still beautiful
perhaps we can talk.
                                  
Perhaps you made me love again.
perhaps you are happy.
and perhaps,
I am
alive.

-tompoet