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360 · Feb 2018
JoshuaX Feb 2018
Sad nights i cry myself to sleep
Depression and anxiety
Are feelings that i keep
I just feel empty
Nobody was there for me
Is it better
To end this life
Close my eyes
Darkness feels the same
I feed myself with lies
Loneliness is my companion
It feels normal to be alone
Always searchin for a home.
343 · Feb 2018
Ice II
JoshuaX Feb 2018
Why don't you leave you'll hurt your self
Leave you broken then blame myself,
Hurt you once then hurt you twice
Feed you with this crazy lies
Im not the man to fantasize
When will you realize,
Im a badboy gotdamn it
Cant understand my mindset
I love you girl thats not true i wanna tell you what i meant
too young for true love sorry you are not it.
309 · Feb 2018
JoshuaX Feb 2018
Forgive me God I am a
Just give me one chance I wanna  see her
Decisions that I made I wish I could change
But I dont regret the time that I met
286 · Apr 2018
JoshuaX Apr 2018
A couple months from now i dont know what i would say
Cause they was always right
Maybe i was born to fail
There are people who is bound for greatness people who prevail
And there are others that only thought theyd be great
I wish i was the first but at the end of the day
I can only dream if i can be like them
I am somethin that nobody would appreciate
275 · Feb 2018
JoshuaX Feb 2018
If we all die
we would all be equal
Think about it for a while
No hate no judgement
If we all die
243 · Nov 2021
more time
JoshuaX Nov 2021
missed u in a day
in a week i am weak
in a month ill lose my mind
in a year, to lose u forever i fear ~
242 · Apr 2018
JoshuaX Apr 2018
I am somethin that nobody would appreciate
Its not that nobody gave a **** or they are trying to hate
But nobody noticed the efforts that i made
People in my life waitin that i fail
225 · Feb 2018
JoshuaX Feb 2018
I know life is hard
Nobody understands
That you are tired
You wanna take a sleep
Rest for a while
They would remember you
They'll attend your funeral.
224 · Nov 2017
failure? ii
JoshuaX Nov 2017
How will I be a winner? when I always lose
How will I be proper? if everything I do is a mess
How can I have happiness? when I am always depressed
What is love? when everyday I am hated
What is hope? when I'm disappointed
How will I know warmth? when my heart is always cold
Why would I hate bronze? if I never had gold
Why would I treasure friendship? if enemies is all i got
Why would I love you? if you never loved me back
What is good? when I don't experience kindness
What is light? if I'm living in darkness
218 · Feb 2018
JoshuaX Feb 2018
Sometimes I wanna thank God he let the devil be with me
So I'd be aware on whoever loves me
Why didn't I notice
I Should've known this
I should've seen this I am turnin like her
I'd take the risk
Everyday it's her that I miss.
218 · Nov 2017
be leave
JoshuaX Nov 2017
I drink to relieve the pain but endin up reliving it
i just want to leave but you forced me to live in it
true love i was believing
then you told me you would be leaving
213 · Dec 2017
JoshuaX Dec 2017
They bullyin to feel better from the life they've been livin
Shouts so loud but can't talk about what they really feelin
Acts so tough but cant handle being alone
You attack the weak cause they got a home
While you only have a house to live in
Where people ignore you and others have been leavin
211 · Feb 2018
JoshuaX Feb 2018
Look through my lens
All i see is violence
It doesnt make sense
But so am i
Sorry my
Friends and family
If y'all could just see
That life is not for me
The question is why
Do people lie
Why do the real ones die.
205 · Feb 2018
A lone
JoshuaX Feb 2018
False hopes and dark thoughts
Neck wrapped with a rope
Salvation you sought
Gave your all
Recieved nothin at all
Now in darkness you fall
205 · Nov 2017
fake love
JoshuaX Nov 2017
What we have is fake cause it happened too fast
You should have just avoided me cause I break hearts for breakfast
And I try to fix it at lunch and hope everything's get better
I regret what I did
I regret everything at dinner
194 · Apr 2018
JoshuaX Apr 2018
Aint nobody laughin but my life is just a joke
Everyday i wear a mask go out there and i pretend
That theres nothin wrong when inside i want to end
My life if i could just take a rest for a while or accept that im depressed
I try to fix my life but its already in a mess
194 · Apr 2018
JoshuaX Apr 2018
Everytime i look at her face
Its a grim reminder
Times when i put my mind into her
The time we falter
When there is no shoulder
To cry on Or a roof to cover
The rain it is so insane
It is a shame that
Evrytime i think of her
Its a grim reminder
Forget everything and
192 · Feb 2018
JoshuaX Feb 2018
She looked me in my eyes like every thing's gonna be okay
Just like the last time she kissed me and then she moved away,
i am used to her actions I'd just be here and i will pray
Sometimes i would think why do i gotta be so wrong
Too many people in the world but now im left alone.
192 · Apr 2018
Sad vibes forever
JoshuaX Apr 2018
Even though i was decieved
I still want you to tell me lies
Even though i was relieved
I know that i cant smile
You showed that there aint nothin true on the things that i believe
If i cant be with you theres no reason for me to live
189 · Feb 2018
Questions II
JoshuaX Feb 2018
Crazy if you thought
That someday i would be leavin,
If you really know me
To us i am believin,
Id be here till i die
I just love you to simplify
I will never ever make you cry.
188 · Feb 2018
Wolf II
JoshuaX Feb 2018
Stared death in its face my hearts starts to race
Thought of leavin life there is so many ways
Go far away so i can leave this place
It wasnt nice to me
Wanted to be free
I will count to three
At the end should be you and me
The sky was already covered
Bad luck to me it showered
By darkness it devoured.
depression inspired
186 · Nov 2021
JoshuaX Nov 2021
she was never in love
and never will
my hope was lost
but i like her still
183 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
hard for me to not have her
nights so cold just like winter
would rather lose everything just to win her
173 · Sep 2021
JoshuaX Sep 2021
In your eyes i was lost
But now i know where i belong
If finding my way will pull me away
Now i know im lost everyday
168 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
Never used drugs but something's crack inside of me
You think I'm good **** evil that resides with me
You better hurt me now got no time for it tomorrow
I'm used with the pain my life full of sorrow
165 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
I always see you in my dreams
can't help but shake
Guess I don't wanna wake up
I'll just see you attending my wake
164 · Apr 2018
JoshuaX Apr 2018
Sometimes i would think why do i gotta be so wrong
Too many people in the world but now im left alone
Hope she realize that id be here today
even if everyone around her dont even want to stay
164 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
She acts like the sun
And i think I'm not her only one
Shine on me when I'm feeling dark
Made me feel like a painter and love is our canvass that turned into art
But i think she was the painter
Cause she gave me nothing but pain after.
162 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
Alcohol's been callin me what should I do
I've been waitin forever just to have you
they cant understand my point of view
just know that whatever happens I'd still love you
159 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
I may not love you first
But I will give you love that last
154 · Apr 2018
JoshuaX Apr 2018
Give hate
Give tears
Be fake
Id still love you
**** me
Hurt me
Lie to me
Id still love you
Not sure if posted already but **** it
150 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
She'll kiss me when shes drunk
Then slaps me when shes sober
Our love starts at night in the morning its over
148 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
Leave me today and fill me with sorrow
I don't take hearts usually I just borrow
I got nothing to say cause I know you'll return tomorrow
And I'll never worry cause everything's alright
I want you the next day guess I'll text you tonight
147 · Apr 2018
Good mourning
JoshuaX Apr 2018
Everyday i wake up thinkin i can rule the world
then i remember your name and suddenly it felt so cold
You stripped away my confidence my memories are evidence of a girl
that did nothin when for him shes the only thing that makes sense
145 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
Lust versus Bible verses
Pray for the universe and
You shall find what you searches
You're not a runner but you gotta deal with the lapses
145 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
I'm not sure of what she made me do
made me into something new
made me felt something that was felt by few
she made me look in a better view
but she changed and left and it was on cue
141 · Feb 2018
Cry I
JoshuaX Feb 2018
They say real men cry, I guess tonight I'm the realest again

Sleepless nights that are full of sorrow,

Hard to sleep knowing no ones
waiting for you tomorrow.
141 · Feb 2018
JoshuaX Feb 2018
Why come back to me im nothin
Arent you tired of cryin?
For me there is no future
Theres nothin else but torture
I cant help myself but hurt her,
Find a man that will treat you right
Im the one till i left
Broken hearts i always kept
Leave you faster than a fighter jet
138 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
Baby i will hit you like a meteorite
You never noticed that i treat you right
We're already together but you still want to meet your right
Us forever you said its just a myth, your right
135 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
Why are you trying to brake the heart of someone with a broken heart

Why won't people care about others who have nothing to care about

We love ourselves but doesn't know how to love others back

Why are you tryna brake the heart of someone with a broken heart

Why wont people care about others who have nothing to care about

We love ourselves but doesn't know how to love others back

We want people giving us love but we don't give it back.
135 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
What if I was born as a failure?
I will never know and I will never be sure
Did my best but it wasn't enough
Stood my ground but I wasn't as tough
I need a rest cause I forgot how to laugh
133 · Feb 2018
Cry II
JoshuaX Feb 2018
You dont have to cry
But maybe you need to,
I know times gettin hard
Cant imagine the things you go through,
Never forget you have people lovin you
So keep your head up
There are people who loves you.
Just cryyy
132 · Feb 2018
Questions I
JoshuaX Feb 2018
Friends are telling me that i should let you go
If i let her go today
I'll take her back tomorrow,
Cant help but wonder
Why do i still want her
Questions that i ask
But i already know the answer.
130 · Apr 2018
Solution II
JoshuaX Apr 2018
No lies no killing
No poor no bad feelings
Young one you don't have to hide
This life there is no guide
But I got you on mind
I know life is hard
Nobody understand
That you are tired
You wanna take a sleep
Rest for a while
They would remember you
They'll attend your funeral
130 · Apr 2018
Solution III
JoshuaX Apr 2018
Boy dont forget to remember me
If this is what you desire
Self healing secrets revealing
They dont understand
But they dont need to
Focus on you
False hopes and dark thoughts
Neck wrapped with a rope
Salvation you sought
Gave your all
Recieved nothin at all
In darkness you fall
129 · Apr 2018
JoshuaX Apr 2018
If we all die
we would all be equal
Think about it for a while
No hate no judgement
If we all die
What if..
127 · Apr 2018
JoshuaX Apr 2018
What if everythins a lie
**** it i would wish that i would die
To tell the truth you never gave a try
You said you love me and then you said goodbye
Life is ****
126 · Feb 2018
JoshuaX Feb 2018
The feelin i thought would be over
Then i found myself never sober
Darker skies are taking over
The nights are getting colder

Consider this as my letter
You know id be here forever
Every night i pray for the better
Your the worst thing i wanna remember
124 · Feb 2018
Ice I
JoshuaX Feb 2018
I am ice cold stay away
Break your heart I'll find a way
Didnt you hear what the stories say
Im heartless **** just go away.
119 · Nov 2017
JoshuaX Nov 2017
I'll get what I want from her until none of her remain

Did all those things and nothing was gained

Regret everything tonight and tomorrow do it all again.
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