When the night falls, I’m left with myself.
Will I fail to reach my full potential?
Or will I figure out a way to survive?

My future is a map.
I try to plan out the trip
But there is lots unknown.
I don’t know where to go.

Tonight I will rest, and tomorrow I will rise.
Who knows what’s in store?
It’s all a surprise.

Dear Family and Friends,

I am sorry for leaving so soon, but I could not see past the blues.
My feelings were heavy and thoughts so unsteady.
I didn’t know what to do.

So here I was, with a blade in my hand.
I shook my head as I made the first cut.
As the blood dripped, I could not resist.
I dropped the blade and lied in pain.
I closed my eyes and whispered goodbye.

Please know this was not your fault.
I could not battle the demons any longer.
I hope you know that I loved you dearly.
Now I am at rest, and I hope you all get the best.

Farewell, little ones.
I hope to see you once again.

“Listen to your heart”
“Follow your dreams”
That’s what people have said to me
But I don’t know what I want
And I don’t know who I am
I feel trapped in my mind
without a clue of what to do

So I pick up the blade and contemplate life
because I’m lost and in despair
My mind has a messed up way of telling me
that one cut will make me feel better
But all I’m left with is the guilt and shame
So I put away the scissors and crawl into bed
There’s work to do and people to meet
But I sink deeper into depression
I won a battle but lost another

Tell yourself you're beautiful
---Because you are

Treat yourself
---Because you deserve it

Take a deep breath
---Because you need it

Appreciate yourself
---Because you're the only you the world has ever seen

You wrap your arms around me
Tell me how I’m beautiful.
The warmth of your body
Makes me feel whole.

But the feelings subside
And depression ignites.
I can’t escape it.
Why can’t I shake this?

I try to tell you that I’m not okay.
But I don’t want to ruin this moment.
So I remain in place.

I’ve been stripped of my happiness.
The warmth is replaced by emptiness.

Depression is ****** up.
Anxiety is a *****.

Sometimes I feel these thoughts and pain won't go away,
But I know there will be better days.

I cannot describe what happens inside,
But I will try to fight it at night.

Keep trudging forward despite it all.
We will make it despite our falls.

You are precious.
When you laugh, I laugh too.
When you crinkle your eyebrows, I smile.
Waking up next to you is a blessing.
When you look at me, I feel so lucky.
I fall in love with you all over again like on the first day we met.