I thought I would never see you again
I convinced myself I didn't want to
I knew it was a lie
Every time I breathed those thoughts
And then I saw you again

I knew you would remember me
Of course you would
After all the time we spent together
You knew who I was
But had very little memory of what happened
Especially after the first month

I tried to put the pain away
But it burned in my lungs to talk to you
It felt like knives along my skin to touch you
I couldn't breathe
But I pushed through

I thought I'd be mad at you
After what you did
And how you hurt me
I was so sure I'd hate you
But it was as if nothing had happened
As if no time had passed since it was good

I'd consider you my best friend
Sometimes it still hurts
I try to ignore it
Because being your friend
Is worth the pain
At least that's what I tell myself

Sometimes I think I might have fallen for you
Most times I think that's a terrible thing
But I really like you
And you don't like me
And it *****
But I know you can't change your feelings

I think I should try to forget you
I try to not text you ever again
I always fail in under a day
Missing you is so easy
Forgetting you is so hard

I know I should distance myself
I know I need space
I know you need space
I'm aware of what I've done
I've tried
I'm sorry

I'm not strong enough

I don’t think some of you know
How much you mean to me.
Every time the bell rings, and
I see you coming out of your class,
Reliable, every day,
Calming me and reassuring me that
No matter what is happening,
The world is still moving.
Every time you smile at me in class,
Even though we don’t really talk,
It brightens my day and
Makes me realize that maybe
Mankind isn’t so bad after all.
Every time we share a laugh,
A football game, a tough test,
A change in the school,
I grow closer to each and every one of you,
Even though you don’t realize it.
But when that final bell rings,
Will you be there?
Will you be with me past final exams,
Graduation,
After the final bell?
Because you will know who your real friends are
When the final bell rings.

What if
I had fallen to my knees
On the cold parking lot concrete
Tears washing over my cheeks
And cries no one should ever have to hear
Bellowing out from beneath my ribs
Screaming at the sky
Looking up at your face
Forcing you
(and everyone else)
To see me in this godforsaken state
Of absolute chaos
Heartbreak
In it's rawest form
What if I had begged you to stay?
What if I'd told you I can't do this without you?
What if I'd told you how much I needed you
What if I did anything other than fighting back the tears
Maybe for myself, maybe for you,
Mostly for the crowd of people gathering
Saying their goodbyes
Anxiously looking around to bear witness to everyone else's reactions
And I didn't want to be that girl
That girl who falls to the ground
Kicking and screaming and crying and begging
But what if I was?
What if I was any girl other than the one I pretended to be that day
The one that held her tongue and kept her mouth shut because she knew the second she opened it to speak she would sob
The one that wrapped her arms around you for the last time,
and the one that let go
The one that couldn't bear to watch you walk away
So she kissed you goodbye
Got back in the car
And drove home
What if i wasn't that girl who didnt allow herself to completely fall apart until she was alone in the privacy of her own home?
What if instead I'd made a scene,
Doing what everything inside me so desperately wanted to
Grabbing hold of your hand and refusing to let go
Losing the facade of confidence
The charade of strength
But I'm not that girl
And I never will be
So each and every time you leave
I kiss you goodbye
I unclench my fists and retract my anchors
I untether my heart from it's human home
And I put on a brave face
Maybe for myself, maybe for you,
Or maybe
For that girl.

He is there but nobody sees him
He speaks but no one can hear
He lives his life in confinement
And no one ever comes near.
To watch him He looks rather lonely
He is lost that is perfectly clear.
Once a child in the arms of his mother
And his father would always be near.
But parants don't last forever
And soon they are no longer here
Now there  is nobody out there
To chase away all of his fears.
He walks to his flat he has no one
Loneliness his only friend
Is this what he really lives for
With nothing to show at the end.
Let's start from the very beginning
It happens in this day and age
Take note of this lonely stranger
Invisible in so many ways.

Why did we go out this night
Got a feeling something's not right
We should of stayed in bed
What was going through our heads .
Walking in the park after midnight
Not so wise if it gives us a fright.
The hooting sound of an owl
A cunning fox on the prowl.
Feeling scared and week at the knees
The creaking branches from leafless trees
The silence is daunting not a soul insight
We should have never gone out so late at night.
Did you see that shadow there ?
To be very honest it gave me scare
It is time to leave and get out of here
Just like a leaf I am shaking with fear.
I hear footsteps on the path
Let's move ahead and not look back
Listen to that eerie laugh
Something is creepy in this park.
Well To tell you the truth I  told you a lie
We never really went out this night
We never even left our bed
This was all a dream inside my head.

Come join us in the garden
Your army days are done
Sit down and take it easy
Enjoy soak up the sun.

Now you need no longer worry
You will never be going back
Relax no need to hurry
Just forget about the past.

You say it's hard to carry on
Leaving the horrors of war behind
You often have those nightmares
From behind the enemy line.

So look now toward the future
The poserbilitys they are vast
There is that new horizon
Even though it's hard to grasp.

Come join us in the garden
Leave those fearful days behind
Look at all the lovely flowers
Representing peaceful times.

Look at this gardens beaughty
The war just had to end
Who knows what lies ahead of you
Your enemy could become your friend.