My heart is heavy at the gates
Where I was caught before;
Could catch my breath beneath the light -
Kneeling at the door
Gothic bars locked from inside
Thrice absent as sorrow states;
Alone there's nowhere left to hide-
heavyhearteed heartbeats- at The Gates

Waged war unto, through words themselves  
I'm obsessed with this fight,
My heart heaves heavy at the gates -
Forever sealed despite.

Austin and I
Move at different speeds.

The fatal race of life we each compete
at a pace unique to ourselves.
I find myself disoriented all the time,
exiting delirium, now on a regular basis...
Each time
requiring
A reorientation
Without which myself is lost.
When each reorientation
Is less accurate than before,
it all becomes inevitablly  lost.

That initial destination I may never know.

Through the haze In my mind
Waves Austin
And in a heartbreaking protest.
Waits Austin.
in a Tribute to nostalgia-
it's Austin-
And in an intersectionally unique pain  we are connected. There, he stays.
And as I slowly, But surely,
Continue my own race-
I glance back, constantly, and his hand still waves me on-
the gift of direction..
.
Now as I lay here
Before I can rise
I force myself to record it
for a better me;
that

Austin and I-
Move at different speeds.

I wish I could fuel you;
fuel me?
yeah-  fuel you.

so you would never end.

you are not asking for too much
no, you are not
maybe he is just not the right person
because the right one for you
will go even through the depths of hell
just to give you whatever he can
and he will love you
so much
that you will regret
asking your past
the least he can give.