I wanted to be so **** beautiful
I wanted nature to fall to my feet
I wanted the mountains to bow
I wanted the trees to weep for the love of me

I wanted to charm the dumbest of boys
I wanted to tempt the strongest of men
I wanted to break thousands of hearts
I wanted them to wake screaming my name

I wanted to be everyone's wildest daydream
I'd play my game without a fault
I'd fulfill my role to perfection: be it
Angel or *****, beggar or queen,
I'd be whatever they needed me to be
And when they relied on me the most
I would leave without a trace, without remorse

Because then, I would never be the one to wait,
The one to cry to sleep each day, I'd
Never be rejected, but keep them staring
At the blankness I'd leave behind me

(As a sidetone:
There are fantasies I'd never dare project into words
Thoughts I've buried deep within my soul,
But, believe me,
This might be the most honest poem I ever wrote).

I don't have the right to write you a poem
But let me do it anyways.

I wish I had been prettier,
more kind, more bold,
I wish I had deserved one of your thoughts.
I was content, though,
Watching you from a distance,
While around you they caved the gold mine,
And all the girls tried their luck.
I was happy enough,
Knowing you knew my name.
I remember you
Not without nostalgia,
Because I wish I had been prettier,
more kind, more bold,
To have deserved one glance, one touch.
But our threads got lost in the riverbed,
I threw my coin and lost you to fate,
That is why I let you go
And be another's,
And maybe someday I'll see you again
And be brave enough to say
That I took my chances and lost the gold,
But that someone I hope deserved you more.

Fallen apples
Fallen trees
I want you here next to me
When the storm begins

The bees kiss the withered roses
The swans swim swiftly through the river rapids
Acorns and chestnuts fall to the ground
Fog and rain all through the day
When the storm begins
I want you here next to me

Great waves transform the shore
The seagulls float and call each other
The boats that left
Have not returned yet.
The sun set, the moon came
But even in the darkness
I can recognize your face.
The storm is beginning
But you are here with me

Your opal eyes, your vintage smile,
Your big rough hands that take mine
I was an old cat that slept too much
But now I'm transformed
And run through the night
By your side

The storm has come
But I know you will stay
Until the end.