a sad soul whispers i wish i never met you to the demon in the empty room and it replies with a voice that flows thick and sweet almost suffocating but darling you created me and it laughs as her tears hit the sheets and it sounds just like him you do this to yourself she can smell his cologne on its breath as it leans closer he doesn't care and neither do i, no one does it blinks and it's eyes turn as blue as his she tries to look away but it grabs her cheeks so she gets one last good look at what she tries to forget it won't let her forget he won't let her forget then it dissipates into the lonely space but the weight never leaves the air
Seducing you away from me. Stealing what our future could be. I try so hard, but I just can't compete. When you'll do anything for your whiskey.
I can dress really **** and fix my hair. I can do my makeup and put on heels, my highest pair. But when you start sweating and your hands are shaking, She's calling to you, and only she can stop your aching.
You'll make excuses and tell me lies. To have her near, right by your side. She's your mistress in a bottle, she tastes so sweet. It doesn't matter what I do, with her you'll always cheat.
i am living three different lives and not one if them makes sense filled with alcohol and raised voices dark nights with questionable choices i don't know who i am i let others decide for me all i know is i'm a mess and these demons seem to adore me i have some issues i can't sort out problems nobody knows about the skeletons in my closet are clawing at the door but there's already so much mess outside how could there be more i'm overwhelmed and tired don't know where to go i can't stand being vulnerable but some wounds we have to show
i go back and forth every couple of months performing my ritual dance of what ifs and i hopes
no matter what i do i always return to this ancestral place of insecurity and naivety
i'm tired of this war waged between my mind and my heart it's caused me to grow old and become someone who is tenfold my age
but time goes on and i'm still here performing the same dance perfecting it for the grand finale of when the vultures swoop in and tear the remains of my heart to shreds
i'm tired of this war i don't know how much more i can take the voices around me say to drop the rope, the game is done but i still find myself tugging with everything i have which is only a fragile wish for a future that may possibly never come
she sat in the sand watching the sun slip below the horizon and thought the words she couldn’t say to him
i wish it would have turned out differently. if i had a different home life or he didn’t think so much. maybe if we had less lonely souls or could turn back time we wouldn’t be where we are now. i wish it wouldn’t have ended the way it did. i never wanted it to end with the thoughts i give up i can’t do it anymore in my head, but now i have no idea what’s in his head and i would love nothing more than to understand his thoughts again. i can’t stand the confusion and mixed signals. i don’t know what i ever was to him, let alone what i am now. we are broken kids in different ways and all i know is that we melted together so well; he made me feel less broken. i just don’t understand why the universe would put two people together that can’t seem to be with each other because my god it’s so much harder to get over someone you’re still in love with, but i suppose that’s how life is huh, complicated.
i was told to make my body my home so i painted embarrassment on the walls and hung hate from the ceilings i am uncomfortable in this home and the image i see saddens me because this home is messy and the other girls are pristine