Somewhere along the line, you changed.
You build walls all around you
and wore armor against the world,
You guarded your heart so well you could behave as though you didn't have one at all,
Even now, it's a shabby broken thing
but you still have it.
Not a heart of stone nor of ice,
But a fragile heart of glass
Sharpened through all its edges to stop anyone from getting in,
To stop the pain from getting out,

I understand why you wear armor,
That's why I wear it too.

No one, no one here, no one there, ever.
Uncared for, it felt dark and misty.
All alone, aside seven billion souls.
Needed only when needed, a solitude.
Ring-fenced in an imaginary world of love.
No escape for me to my reality, it hurts.
Kept knocking on the walls, for affection.
Wisely I tethered on, purposely off,  living in a solstice of dream.

You lurked as my shadow
The shadow of immense love and affection
Even under the scorching sun, your shadow shaded me in my journey
Shadow that follows me everywhere, softly soothing my pain and agony

In your nothingness, I found you
In my nothingness, you discovered her
Leaving me to grief losing you
With such heavy heart I let you go
Only to meet you often in my dreams
A dream where you are a part of my being.

News comes in spectrums
In the sun in the rain
Delivered by stork or by train
Not cloaked in fairytales
Cancer was the news
No tomorrow I wonder

I stood still amidst the cold stone room
Attentively listening to the news caster
A breeze of life flew out of me
As I gazed in awe about tomorrow
Devastated but without known sorrow
Life goes on said the unforgiving news breaker

In emptiness I glimpsed into the future
The day my loved ones living without mama

Clueless
i solve the tangled beads
chaotic sequence of anxiety

each bead has a peculiar ding
some are noise
and some are euphony

i bought this chain years back
it was less tangled then ,
however i entwine it bad

shop fortune smuggled me this chain
gave me deal , to untangle this chain
And live eternity ....

Her blue eyes meet mine.

Her gaze is firm, she radiates authority, strenght.

Her feet, etched to the ground.
No hurricane, no tornado will move her.

Yet her eyes somehow reveal a soft side.
There's something childish and playful in that smirk of hers.

I wonder who she is.
So familiar, yet unknown.

I envy her.
That strong woman.

Where have I seen her?

I hear a whisper, a voice I recognize.

"Look again".