"Work hard and show the life you always wanted to lead to all the people around you who are confused about what you'll do in life and confusing you in reaching your aim."

make the art you search for
the kind of art
you never find
but always feel.

the kind that
holds your hurt
without asking a million times,
"why?"
the kind that feels
like being seen.

and maybe it's not out there
because it's waiting
for you
to create it.

Time is out,

Tomorrow watches me - I look back,
Building a chair in anticipation of my arrival It whispers to me,
“You’ll never be ready”

I blame myself,
The silence that filled moments,
Times I should’ve listened
To the effort that was screaming to be,

A knife i stuck in my own back,
The knife I placed there
The knife that I wanted to be the reason I failed?

Did I ever want to succeed?

Did I avoid trying so I had more to blame than just not being able to cut it?

I don’t try, I don’t succeed.
What… do I expect of me?

When moments of need
Moments in which I should’ve done more,
I stood still.
Contemplating a life that I’m not fighting for-

And now it’s too late,
Time is short— what-else is left,
But to now sit in thought,
Alone with the understanding,

That I did this.
I hurt myself.
I deserve the failure that will consume me.

Was time too short,
Or did I just ignore it.

I am a bit unlucky
Yes, not always can everybody be lucky
But misfortune has befallen me many a time
My marriage was a ball of slime
I have lost a few friends
Though my behaviour towards them was almost blameless
Many a time, I get credit not
Even if my work is nearly perfect
Due to my Asperger's Syndrome
I do not feel at home
During many a social interaction
Really, do I do my best, to make a good conversation
However, mistakes are inevitable
Because, perfection is impossible
My ignorance is not my fault
It is God's fault
Definitely, do I need some compensation
For each and every misfortune of mine
Struggling am I, to find love
Though there is a lot, that I can give
Being a divorced male is a big curse
In a society that has a huge bias
Against anyone who is "different"
However, I will fight
To overcome all my insecurities
And drive away all my demons
But I certainly need some luck
Otherwise, life will remain dark
Yes, I am a bit unlucky for sure
However, I will try my best to ensure
That this does not remain the case
Wrong, will I prove all my doubters
Rise will I, against all odds
For now, am I overthinking
But soon, will I be planning
To rise from the ashes, like a true phoenix
Yes, not at all easy, is achieving success
However, as mentioned earlier
I am a fighter
And soon, will the fight begin
For now though, I am alone
Again, I am a bit unlucky
But soon, will I be lucky!

Every Morning,when I rise, I do make sure
there’s nothing in my mind
nothing in my body
and nothing in my soul
as if I am a bottomless whole
as if I am a fresh born baby

Then I make sure,whatever work I am going to do
In the day
Will improve my mind,body or soul or
Somebody’s other body, mind or soul
And if my work is neither doing anything I said above
Then I am a useless monster just passing my time for sure

And when I have done the improvement work
Then every night, when I sleep
I feel mind like heaven
Feel my soul dancing
Feel my body energetic

And  if I have done no improvement work
Then I feel no difference between
Rising and sleeping.
I was a bottomless whole and still
Have achieved no goal.

Now you decide o people!!
Whether you want difference in your rise and sleep
Or you just want similarity
And remaining at the bottom of heap.

Choice is yours o people!!
Options are mine
I suggest you  to chose the improvement option
As it will take you to the cloud nine.

And then every morning, when I rise.
I do make sure……
I do make sure……