You are!
The source of
Pleasure and calmness!
I recall You!
In deep city noises
I request You!
In deep dark nights
I talk with You!
In a solitude
I smell You!
Everywhere
When I wander about
I have You!
When I need You, Lord!
You are the answer!
Of unseen questions
You are the solution!
Of upcoming problems
O! my Lord!
You are!
The source of
Pleasure and calmness
For the heart
That recalls You!
With and within heartbeats.

am I become an asterisk in your life,
a small reminder of what once was soul-deep,
was the trumpet-radiance of character?
I wander, unshod, in the wilderness created of myself,
to revisit a dystopian dream, where my soul-scars
bleach white from time’s long goodbye
and my caged heart sings a canary’s song to no one

am I become Bukowski’s consummation of grief
dancing on thorns to a choreography of remorse
to a dissonancy of love?

when did I become a mere star-point in your
wintercircle, lost in the wilderness of your sky,

an asterisk abandoned in your asterism?


c. 2017 Roberta Compton Rainwater

I wanna begin this off with I'm sad for everything that I did

got on your every single nerve when I was a child

played with some of your feelings

pushed each and every catch

be that as it may, there was never a period where you didn't demonstrate to me a mom ma's loving

there's kin out there that has never held their mom's hand

I'm sufficiently blessed to state you helped shape me into a man

indeed, even in the most wiped out of well being

you still dependably put us before yourself

I was excessively youthful, making it impossible to perceive the amount you needed to give up

long days

longer evenings

at work simply wanting to be home during the evening

I realized that you didn't generally have additional cash to pay a sitter

since regular that momma went to work

every one of us children would run with her

none of us at any point truly minded

it got every one of us to spend a tad of family time

you generally dealt with us kids transforming each house into a home

giving every one of us something that we could call our own

I realized that I was sheltered with you I never needed to stress

since on the off chance that I at any point required you

you were in that spot in a rush

in the event that there was a mother of the year grant

you would be the one

I would never truly thank you for everything that you've done

I truly am advantaged to have a mother like you

no mother could ever come close with everything you do

You are with me Lord!
Universe is seeking You!
I need not at all

Talk to me as I hold your hand
Tell me and I'll understand
Hold me close as you whisper to my ear
I'll wipe away that innocent tear

Will I have any grace after tonight.
Will the intrigue of the day get me by.
Can I stand up for what I feel is right.
Can I let go of all the pain and scars.

For I know, each and every day without you.
Keeps tearing at my most grateful heart.
For I know, that no matter what I go through.
Living without you has been the hardest part.

Will I find the grace to leave without a wimper or snear.
Will the magic you've left me materialize.
Can the day be greeted with sweet cheer.
Can my heart be softened, more like I can recognize.

Or just left out like before.
Saying they can't accept what's been placed.
Open hole, cover up the floor.
Just where the unnameable are placed...
Let me find the grace.

T L H Joyner 9/17

I know what a crash dummy feels
While pouring down rain was humming
Bracing myself with nerves of steel
Eyes wide won’t stop trouble coming

Driving cautiously in the storm
So many cars speeding on past
I’m thinking easy, slow, steady
Not fight or flight before a crash

I know how a crash dummy copes
Eyes wide open with teeth revealed
Safety first face forward bravely
Ever expecting he will yield

Disbelief that it’s barreling
Faster and faster, I lean in vain
No place to go but the shoulder
That whizzing missile blurs in the rain

I saw it coming without the squeals
Pathfinder’s barrel fully loaded
No skidding tires or screeching wheels
Slow motion shards of glass imploded

My little red car lurches forward
In a bang she begins to swerve
That SUV slammed into me
Before dropping back at the curve

I feel what a crash dummy feels
Releasing the damage inside
To let go the past and its sorrows
Straight ahead, there’s nowhere to hide