Dr. Faust was sitting at an outdoor village cafe
w/ his new 20-something gf who liked to think
herself a white witch no matter how Faust tried
to tell there was no such thing; all witches were
black; but gf says 'that's not true! What about
Samantha on Bewitched? & the wicked witch was
green, not black, u dodo,' she said affectionately;
Faust knew better to argue if he wanted to keep
getting laid every hour on the hour; in heaven,
Hegel caught up w/ Plato & asked: 'whatever
happened to my old friend Johannes?' Plato just
shook his head & said, 'dude - Faust found a ***
object & is having a grand time.' Hegel looked
surprised & said: 'I thought that was one of ur wild
ideas of perfection; u know, an ideal form;' Hegel
bitterly complained, but Plato stayed cool, & said;
'no, dude - u asked me what was new w/ mankind;
I told u women have taken over; men are at their
mercy; 'but- but - if men are that their mercy how
is Faust able to get along so well?' - Plato had to grin,
'seems he's thrown himself to the wolves - relying
on their giving him shameless mercy *** - Hegel was
perplexed, knowing full well that if Faust could pull
it off he'd never go back to heaven; Faust was already
hanging pictures in 22-year-old Jezebel's loft; Faust
was old but he could change his appearance being a
ghost & still in league w/ u-know-who so he had ready
cash & a change of wardrobe; Satan gave him a VISA
card with unlimited credit & Faust took Jezebel shopping;
she liked clowns so he took her to the circus; she liked
ice cream so he stuck up an ice cream truck to her glee;
[Archimedes was measuring a jigger of Uzo when Hegel
knocked; 'son of a - who is it?' - 'George - '
Archimedes downed his sloppy shot & opened the door:
'what now?' 'Faust took off back to earth to find out what
a [***♀︎object] is; Plato says he found one & is living it up;
Archimedes looked askance at his friend & neighbor;
'What's a [***♀︎object]?' - 'That's what I said!'
'We'd better ask Pascal; he'll know -'
Pascal: 'u guys are both idiots.
A ******♀︎object is obviously an object one has *** w/.'
'no no no -' fumed Hegel, 'I say *** is its own object,
that the object of *** is to achieve the ****** object.'
Archimedes, no dummy, said: 'all I know about *** is to stick
***** in the snooch; that is the most natural connection in all
creation; like a lever & fulcrum; I am the ****** object & she
is the ****** object & together we are both the ****** object!'
Pascal couldn't help but compliment the old Greek;
'That's some mighty fine philosophizin' there, Archie;
what say we get down to earth & scare up ol' Faustus;
he can show us where to find a couple of those [***♀︎objects] -
